Why Do Holidays Seem To Suck?

[nicholewalters]

Well, it's the holidays again and it's time to be jolly. Yeah right. Last year almost didn't have a Christmas because I lost my job of 4 years. My MIL bought all the presents for the kids and we just divied them up into Santa, us, and her gifts. My mom got us a little fake tree like one of the table top ones, my kids loved it. Now Christmas is rearing its ugly head and I am not looking forward to it. MIL is already saying it will be a slim Christmas this year. She has been living off her retirement from when she was laid off a few years ago and she just left her fiancee and the move cost her about $600 just because she didn't pay attention to the mileage on the Uhaul agreement. And she always seems to live above her means most of the time, plus she is paying to go to school. So, this year really the only gifts my children will get is the treats that we will be making. My mom works at Gold Canyon Candles and so she gets a discount and has been giving me some of the candles that she buys. So we will be taking the candles and some of the treats and that will be gifts to family this year.

I hate the holidays, my girls already go without anything extra, even new clothes just so we can make the bills. I finally had to buy a pair of jeans because my last pair ripped. I have about two to three outfits of my own and my kids have about two to three weeks worth of clothes. It is breaking my heart that this year Santa won't really be coming. I am going to try and follow my own advice and spend time with my children and make some memories. But with all the problems, it is so hard to keep my chin up.

Does anyone else feel this way? I just pray every week that I hit the lottery so my children and family will never have to go without again. Thank you for listening.