Hospital or Home- A Difficult Birth Choice

[ethans_momma06]

When my DH and I started TTC for the second time, we had it strongly in our minds that while we had an extremely wonderful home birth the first time around, a hospital birth would be what we were aiming for the second time around. After all, DH hadn't told us his parents where we birthed the last time around and they have had the distinct impression that we underwent a hospital birth 2 1/2 years ago. And to top it off, in the back of every pregnant woman's mind (no matter how healthy she knows she is) there is always the sometimes irrational fear of something horrible happening.

So we wanted a birth place that was the bestplace in case of emergency, and with all due respect to home-birthing, no where beats hospitals 'in case of emergency'. A place where DH could invite his family since they weren't there the first time. A hospital birth was the first on our list. But then, I got pregnant.

We were at my In-Laws when I found out and a few days before flying home we stopped by the OB/GYN (who was one of the biggest asses I've ever seen). He told me that he didn't want to waste my blood or urine confirming the pregnancy since I wouldn't be sticking around, and that my 15 hr flight home 'would probably be fine'. Of course he didn't check any thing at all, which makes me wonder how he could make that call. But my DH assured me that we would make an appointment with the Dr. as soon as I got home. Before I left on my trip home I scoured the web pages of local hospitals looking at prices and possible discount programs because, yes, I am one of the 31 million who just happens to be uninsured.

But when I got home, DH put off making the appointment. For some reason, it never got made. DH told me to make a list of possible OB/GYNs I would be interested in seeing, and we even narrowed down our hospital choice to two. But we still didn't go. My friend gave birth in the hospital during my wait, and everything went fairly smoothly. Her second birth, a little pitocin to help her finish dilating (not so lightly there was a lot of consideration and waiting put into it) and a happy, safe, and healthy vaginal delivery.

Except that she was advised not to bring her first child into the hospital because of the H1N1 virus that is running rampant around our beautiful country, and our entire planet. Now this piece of advice actually makes a lot of sense seeing as how the majority of people with a life threatening contagious illness will eventually show up at a hospital. It is, after all, the place where emergency's go to be healed.

But I was really disturbed. Why the HELL would I want to birth a brand new baby with a brand new never been tested immune system in a place where I wouldn't want to take my 2 year old? In a place with a known deadly disease? Why would Iwant to voluntarily be there? So I admit that as much as I liked the whole 'Hospital Birth Idea', I began to re-think it just a little. After all, while it's unlikely that H1N1 will be circulating around like it is now in June, there is no guarantee that it WONT be there. Or that some new extremely dangerous deadly disease wont be (I mean, these things DO tend to crop up now and again...SARS, Bird Flu, Black Plague). And for the safety of my family I can't justify, I can't risk, going to a place where I know people who are harboring contagious disease are, except in case of emergency.

And then, I am almost 11 weeks pregnant and still have not made any appointments for any type of prenatal care. And that scares the living daylights out of me. While I will consider (and have done) a home birth, there is no way I would ever consider an 'unassisted birth'. So I checked out some new midwives and found one who has competent medical training (she was a labor/delivery nurse at a high risk hospital for 5 years before becoming a certified nurse midwife, before becoming a professional, certified midwife), and one who looks like she has access to more medical equipment then my last one did, and ultra sound machine, emergency equipment, etc. And so, after some deliberation with my DH, we have decided to drop the Hospital Birth plan for another home birth one.

We still have our fears that we will discuss with our care giver, but I will finally be getting the prenatal care I need. On a good note, while we lived miles away from a hospital our first time around, we live literally two blocks away from one now. I hope and pray that things will got smoothly, and I hope that parents who are making the hospital vs home birth choice really sit down and weight the pros and con's. After all, in case of emergency, there's no better place to be then at a hospital, but there's not better place to be then home if everything is safe and sound.

 

[RanaAurora]

Nov. 24, 2009 at 12:56 PM

First, the naval hospital wouldn't even SEE me until I was 11 weeks.

Second, I wish birthing centers - a fantastic middle ground - were much more available.

Good luck in your birth!

[logansmomma2007]

Nov. 24, 2009 at 1:15 PM

It sounds like you put a lot of thought into this :-) 

Since your provider is a CNM she should have hospital rights...at least that is how it works in FL.  As long as she has a good relationship with the closest hospital everything should go smoothly in the event of an emergency.  It usually takes hospitals up to 30 minutes to prep the operating room anyway. 

[evwsquared]

Nov. 25, 2009 at 4:00 PM

I wish that you had a birthing center as an option! Ours is attached to the hospital and run by midwives. My daughter was birthed by a midwife, but they had a doctor come in to stitch me up. I agree with logansmomma that it would be great to have a certified nurse midwife who has hospital privileges.

Congratulations on the baby!!!!