Gabriel's birth story

[MommyToBe1023]

For the first week or so after Gabriel was born, I was happy with my birth. And then slowly it started to sink in, everything that happened, and even though when I try to talk to anyone about it I get several comments like: "You wanted to have your baby at home like you're living in some third-world country?!"

I couldn't believe it. I was furious. No one took me seriously because of my age. Here's Gabriel Damien Agron's birth story.

 

Two weeks and three days before my 16th birthday, I was due. I didn't think I'd make it to my due date, thanks to lots of pre-term labo scares. Almost all the women in my family have delivered ON their due dates, so every twinge, every kick I felt on October 6th just HAD to be it. Finally, at about 9pm, I gave up and admitted defeat. This child was not coming today. I laid down angrily with a big place of spaghetti to watch television next to my dad. Cranky and angry, I cursed out loud when I got what I though was BH contractions disrupting my perfectly good meal. After an hour or two I noticed they were about 5-7 minutes apart. I knew it was real labor, but I didn't want the whole, "OMG WE HAVE TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL RIGHT NOW OR WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!" thing to start to happen. I tried to sleep, but I was too antsy and the contractions hurt worse when I lay down. I went downstairs, called my sister and told her what was happening while I paced my living room. Finally, around 1am, I lay down on the sofa to get some sleep.

 

My dad comes downstairs and yells at me for sleeping on the couch. I'm too angry to bother getting up, but then a strong contraction gets me to my feet and rocking against the recliner. I go up to my bed, and sleep until 3:30. After that, I couldn't sleep anymore, I was too excited. I was happy and smiling, my baby's coming soon! I called my mom, who lives in Georgia, and told her the baby's coming. She responded, of course, with the typical, "OMG WE HAVE TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL RIGHT NOW OR WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!". I told her until I eat no one was getting me to leave that house. I put some water to boil for more spaghetti( Peanut was a noodle baby =D) and feel the contractions pick up again. I wake up my dad, tell him what was going on and he was perfectly calm. My grandma wakes up too and starts freaking out. They yell at me to take a shower even though water did NOT sound good right then, and I run(waddle) upstairs and get in the shower in a flurry of hormonal tears.

 

I absolutely HATED it. I got out of there as soon as possible. I got dressed, got the baby things together, grabbed extra pillows. I was nice and calm, humming through contractions. Ate spaghetti, called my doctor. They said I sounded too calm to be in labor. I asked them if I had to be screaming like a banshee to be in labor. They didn't say anything. By now they were 3-5 minutes apart, but not very intense. I was stil humming through them, but my family made me feel awkward, so I stopped. Finally, at 6am, I got a really bad one, and I knew we had to leave. Worst 15 minute car ride of my life. We get there, they put me in triage, hook me up to the monitors and tell me to wait for the doctor. His heartbeat calmed me down, but the wires would only let me walk about two feet. They came in and told me I had to lay down, I told them I refused to lay down. Still waiting for the doctor, I took myself off the monitors so I could walk, and it was a constant battle of them putting them on and me taking them off. Right before 9am, they checked me and I was 5cm, 100%, my bag of waters was bulging andthe baby was -1. I was admitted to my room right away, and I told them I wanted to get in the tub. They said no problem, as long as I wasn't 8 or more centimeters.

 

SO got there, finally, and he massaged my back through contractions while I vocalized. The next hour was annoying, because family kept trying to be in the room. I kicked everyone out, I didn't want anyone there. They were really picking up, I was walking all around my room, rocking against SO, vocalizing. at 10am, they checked me to get into the tub, I was an 8-9! So no tub for me. :[ I walked the halls until I couldn't walk through contractions anymore, transition was really setting in hard. I felt a trickle, my water broke. I was feeling the urge to push, but it hurt terribly, I lost my calm. They checked me, I was 9-10, and my water broke. All hell broke loose and 15 minutes later I was pushing.Then the contractions stopped. I lay down, chatted with my SO while they set up. They kept saying don't push, but I did anyway. Then, the worst part ever, they took cold water and poured it on my hoo-ha. I screamed! Then they wiped with the iodine and then they tried to tell me how to push. I didn't bother listening, just pushed when I had the urge. Then, a very rude nurse told me I was doing it wrong! I told her to fuck off. I reached down to feel his head and laughed. Then, with the next push, the Ring of Fire. SO TRUE! His head was out and I said, "I'm done!" with a big grin. Then they said, "No, you still have the rest of him to push out!"

 

So with one not even real push, Gabriel Damien Agron was born at 12:05pm on October 7th. 6lbs 8oz, 19 1/2 inches long. They tried to put a dose of Pitocin in my IV and I grabbed the nurse's hand and said, "NO." The placenta slid right out a second later without anyone doing anything. He cried right away, then stopped and stared right at me with these beautiful big eyes.

I didn't have the birth experience that I wanted, and the hospital's interfering lead to having problems with breastfeeding that after seeing 3 LC's, couldn't be fixed. I'm still sad that because I didn't have options, it lead to not being there for his first bath, being seperated from him, and ultimately not being able to give him the best. Please, for any other pregnant mom's who have the options I didn't and still choose the hospital, DON'T. The miracle of life is not an emergency, and they do not respect mother or baby's wishes in favor of "protocol" and "procedure". Do it for the birth both you and your baby deserve.

[soontobemommy22]

Nov. 26, 2009 at 3:00 PM

WOW! Hun you are a trooper! Congrats on ypur little guy! I am sorry they treated you that way I really am! I am execpting my 2nd in Late Feb. Who is a a boy his name will be Caden Austin! I have a little girl her name is Taylor Grace she will be 19 months when Caden is born

[mimi_emc2]

Nov. 26, 2009 at 6:20 PM

I had both my babies at a hospital. One was in a civilian hospital and the other was an Army hospital. I had great nurses and doctors. I had a great experince. I am sorry you didnt get the same.

[sweetjessa]

Nov. 27, 2009 at 1:03 AM

I dont know if it makes any difference but I had my first son at 15 and I was treated like crap and my second child at 30 and treated like a queen and I am sure I will get the same treatment this time same staff ...I am sorry you went through next time when you go for a tour and get registered make sure you express your wishes so there is n confusion

[wendy46121]

Nov. 27, 2009 at 10:31 AM

Unfortunately women are never told about their birthing options BEFORE it happens, and we have to go through traumatic experiences before we even realize that things can be done differently.  

After having my first, at age 16, in a hospital, I wanted to have my second at home, but didn't because I gave into everyone else's fear... Finally I got to have my third baby at home. 

Next time you already know what you want... stay home :)

Congratulations, and enjoy your babymoon!

[piwife]

Nov. 27, 2009 at 10:54 AM

i had great births at hospitals. maybe the military one wasnt that good. but if i ever have another baby am going to the hospital

[outstandingLove]

Nov. 27, 2009 at 2:58 PM

I LOVE your birth story. And congrats on being so well informed about birth at such a young age.

But i don't understand why you have lost hope on breastfeeding. Keep trying. And pump if you can too.

Congrats on a beautiful baby and i hope that the next time you give birth it will be everything you want it to be.

[MommyToBe1023]

Nov. 27, 2009 at 8:56 PM

I'd like to add that I only mean don't have your baby in the hospital if you are considering other options. I know alot of people are much more comfortable there, and everyone has their own choices. But if you're considering doing an out-of-hospital birth, or are looking into it, whether it be at a birth center or your home, then I strongly urge you to DO IT! :]

(Original Poster)

[jus1jess]

Nov. 27, 2009 at 10:17 PM

Good for you! I had the same hell w/ my hospital birth and hated it. Congrats on the new baby though!

[jus1jess]

Nov. 27, 2009 at 11:17 PM

Question for those who said they were happy w/ their hospital births: What exactly made it good? The most common complaints on hospital births is the limitations and pressure to go against nature. Ex: no moving, strapped in bed, one uncomfortable position, pitocin, water breaking, IV, etc. Was it that your hospitals didn't enforce typical protocol or that you didn't mind that they did?

[charisma10]

Nov. 28, 2009 at 3:05 PM

i ran across your story.  never had a hospital birth, never will.   if you had been able to birth youir baby in the tub, you would have skipped that ring of fire feeling.  water takes it away.

 

i would freak out in a hosptial.