Being a paranoid mom.

[MommyKelley04]

Oh yes.  I think I have first-time mom syndrome with my second child!  LOL.  Seriously.  I am a hundred times more paranoid with Hannah  than I was with Hailey.  Maybe back then I didnt know enough, I didnt know anything to be so scared of.  I didnt get online alot, I didnt have CafeMom to scare me by reading all the crazy posts, lol.  I never once read a parenting book.  I just parented, and still do.  Common sense & instincts, thats all.  I dont look into 'methods' and get all into these books that tell you what to do.  I just do what feels right, and its worked great apparently...(I have an incredible almost-6 year old to prove Im doing something right).  But Im just super protective this time around, not sure why...

Not that I see anything wrong with it, because I dont.  Its just weird.  Hannah has 6 teeth or so & can eat things alright, but I do make sure everything is torn into very small pieces for her.  Its not going to stop her from learning to eat, lol.  It just stops her from getting choked.  Im super paranoid & freak out when a baby gets choked, I really do.  I get SUCH a horrible, frantic feeling.  Like today at lunch, Hannah shoved a couple yogurt melts in her mouth...Seth was by her high chair, not me, and he didnt stop her (I would have) and sure enough, I looked over & she couldnt breath, not even to cough.  Took her a few seconds to even be able to gag & cough it up, and it makes me SO terrified feeling.  I snapped at Seth a little, and I felt awful.  I hugged him when we got home & apologized, but he understands.  Thats why we get along so well, lol.  We know the other one just has moments, everyone does, and thats okay.  We dont let it ruin our whole day.  We just move on.  I just freaked out because I dont like to see my kid not being able to breathe.  Im SO friggin scared. 

And as far as leaving her...yea, we have left her a handful of times, for no longer than a couple hours to go have dinner or something, but I miss her SO much.  I guess with Hailey, I had to work full time & I always had to spend alot of time away from her because of it.  I never thought twice about it, its just what I had to do.  I wasnt terrified when she stayed with my mom or grandma during the day while I worked.  And sure I missed her, but I was fine.  Now, though, when I am away from Hannah for a couple hours, I miss her so much.  I feel so empty.  She is on my side all day, every day.  We go places together, we hang out together all day while daddy is working & Hailey is in school.  Im just used to having her with me, so when shes not, it feels so unnatural.  There's only like, 2 people I will leave Hannah with, too.  I wont just drop her with any family member.  My mom & Seths mom...for now, thats it.  Im just not comfortable with anyone else having her.  She is high maintenance and likes things her way, and the thought of her spending even a couple hours with someone who doesnt know all her little quirks & habits makes me uneasy.

Who knows.  I think Im backwards, though.  LoL.

[MSugarKane]

Dec. 1, 2009 at 7:19 PM

No, no, your instincts are totally lined up right.   Just wait until grandchildren come, it all becomes a million times more important with each child.