I hate being poor.....

[derubink]

I know, someone is going to jump in and say soething like "well I lived in a shelter for 6 months' or "we didn't eat for 3 weeks".  I know people are worse off than me, but I am pretty much stuck where I have been stuck my whole life, even when I was a kid.  We are living with my in-laws (which isn't so bad, I really do enjoy their company), we just filed bankruptcy, our car isn't terribly old (2005) but we still can't afford repairs on it (we don't have a car payment - got a really good deal on it a couple years ago).  Yes, i m a SAHM, something I always wanted to be, but not for the reason I became a SAHM.  I stay home because after daycare costs it was costing me money to go to work every day.  I would go work at night, but my husband doesn't have reliable enough hours to be sure he can be home with the kids (that and I don't honestly think he could handle watching the kids night after night).  I am sick of never having new clothes (95% of my clothes are hand me downs from my MIL that are too big and not my thing).  I am sick of watching everone else go out and get a nice hair cut/dye and go get their nails done when I don't even have much makeup.  I am sick of only being able to take my kids to do things because I basically get charity (like my childrens museum membership is free because I am low income.)  I am sick of hearing other people complain they only get to go out and have a nice sit down dinner once a week when I am lucky if I can afford McDonalds.  I am sick of not making the decision to buy myself an $8 shirt because the money could be much better spent on groceries.  I am sick of cutting my bangs and then hating the way I look in the mirror for 2 months.  I am sick of feeling guilty for buying my kids the clothes they need because we really don't have the money.  Now I am starting to hate myself thinking this is my fault and if I had gone to college I wouldn't be here.  I tried once to go to college, but when my second child was born I didn't have enough time to focus on my online classes.  I am sick of finding no help but ridiculous work at home scams that say "Pay us money and we will show you how to make money ."  I know, there are legitimate work at home jobs out there, most of them require a phone, and I don't get enough quiet in my house EVER to have a job that requires the phone.  I can't talk to my husband because he always takes everything so personally and just assumes I am blaming him for everything no matter what it is.  I can't take this anymore! 

[mels_mom]

Jan. 8, 2010 at 2:30 PM

Did you read my diary? lol Just kidding I dont keep one, but that sounds like my exact story word for word except we dont live with my in-laws, but very close to it.  I know you are just venting and all but I just pray and try to keep my head up. I know how yu feel about how ppl complain that they only get to go out once a week and u cant even get McDonalds lol thats not  funny but I know what you mean. I wanted to get some pizza the other day and was like dang, I can get a pack of chicken and mac and cheese instead.   Keep your head up sweetie things will get better.

[baconbits]

Jan. 8, 2010 at 2:30 PM

Can you look to buy things at goodwill and then turn around & sell them on EBAy for a profit? Check with your local college and see if you can get financial aid to get into college & then check with the local vocational school to see if you can get free preschool while attending. How about babysitting at someone else's house and being able to take your own children? There's several groups on here that can recommend home based businesses

 

[JHall]

Jan. 8, 2010 at 2:37 PM

I know the feeling. My husband got laidoff last march and he has been looking for a job but nothing is out there that would pay enough to make the bills. I haven't worked in 4 years. Afet our second daughter was born I knew then I could not go back to work cause of her health. She spent 6 months in the NICU and 7 months at home with doc visits 4x a week I was the only one that knew how to give her meds and how to do the thearpy she needed if the thearpy lady called out. So I've been out of the job market too long now.  I hate feeling like this and there is really nothing we can do about it. We do not go out and haven't been out on a date in well over a year but that is our choice. My lil sis on the other hand doesn't make enough to go out she hasn't paid rent in 4 months but lives behind my grandmother who is bugging her for the rent. She can pay it but decided not to do so??  I don't know. She thinks that she needs to be out every night then fusses about never having money. She really needs to look at the people that really don't have the money to buy like you said mickyD's or new clothes for the kids. Most everyone is hurting some worse then others.  This crap really sucks right now we are living on unemployment and that only pays enough to pay bills and nothing more.  I hope things start looking up for you and your family!!!

[derubink]

Jan. 8, 2010 at 3:45 PM

I tried to buy things at local thrift stores and sell them on ebay for awahile, I was doing really well with maternity clothes, but then the pool of maternity clothes worth buying just seemed to dry up.  So I was just wasting gas driving all over town regularly and not buying anything.  Unfortunately most of the groups here that I have seen for work at home help end up boiling down to nothing but people trying to sell you on their multi-level marketing business that consists more of recruiting new reps than actually doing something.  I thank everyone for their support and comments though!!!!!

 

(Original Poster)