Mom

[HeatherReneeB]

I was going to write something, probably more silly then not... but then I found out some news and it's been making me think all day.

A girl I went to high school with is missing her mother terribly today. Her mother died this morning after fighting brain cancer for the past 4 months. My mom and her mom were friends.. they met at church.

It got me thinking though.. what would I be doing and feeling today if it had been my mom?

my dad, my mom & me when I was a baby

Growing up, I can honestly say that my mom and I were not close. In fact, for a couple of years my mom hated me and I hated her (we still loved each other, we just didn't like each other.. she didn't like the person I was being, and I didn't like that she was trying to control me) It wasn't until I moved away with Randy that I started to actually like and respect my mom. Over the past 7 years we've actually grown close, even though we haven't always lived close by. And in 2007/2008 we actually moved back in with her, and we got along great. She has become a friend.

So, when I found out that Dawn had passed away, and what Danielle might be going through, I started crying. I didn't know Dawn that well, and Danielle and I weren't really friends in high school, but "What if it had been MY mom?"  upset me so much... I can't even imagine not being able to just pick up the phone and just talk about dumb stuff like who she thinks will win survivor, or to talk about how the boys are driving me crazy. I can't picture going to her house (which we do about once a month or so) and her not being there... Not getting her forward emails that always have a life lesson in them, or her pop up messages on facebook while she should be working. Not having the silly little games of hand and foot with her... or trying to show her how a computer program works for the fifth time. I wouldn't be able to even look at HER chair where she sits almost every night to watch some tv and cross stitch. I probably wouldn't be able to make pancakes without thinking of her.. she make sthe best.

I can't begin to even think about our lives without her and how that would affect my boys. They are still young enough that they wouldn't remember her. I can't bare that... She loves them so much, and they love her too... I dont want them to ever not be able to remember her.

I never realized how lucky I am to still HAVE my mom. She's supported me through everything, even if she didn't agree with it. Her parenting and my parenting are completely opposite.. but she still supports everything I do.  I can always turn to her. A lot of people don't have that. I just took advantage of it. I won't ever do that again.

I love you mom. I know I don't say it too often, but I do... with all my heart.

 

 

[RunninRagged64]

Jan. 17, 2010 at 7:53 AM

That is a really nice sentiment.  Love the pictures!! 

[Lb128f]

Jan. 18, 2010 at 3:39 AM

Saying a prayer for Danielle and her family.

Beautiful post for your Mom...I hope she sees this!