ADHD and going out of my mind

[stephanie_b]

HELP!

Sorry - don't mean to be quite so dramatic, but that's really the only word that comes to mind right now. I'm on a roller coaster I never asked to ride, scared of heights, and I feel a bit like throwing up.

My son, Quinton, will be 8 years old next week. We've always known that he wasn't like other kids - where they would sit still and listen to stories, he'd climb the walls; where they would play quietly with one another, he would engage in a game of tag that no one else knew they were playing. ADHD floated across my brain time and time again, but who wants to admit that there's something "wrong" with their child?

In kindergarten, he was in trouble DAILY. That, coupled with the fact that he had the worst kindergarten teacher I've ever met led me to pull him out of school after spring break and homeschool for the remainder of that year and the whole of the next year. However, kids are social children, and I knew how badly he wanted to be in regular school with regular friends, so I enrolled him for second grade.

His teacher this year is fabulous. He never gives up on him, tries everything he can think of to get him to succeed - but the fact remains, something isn't right. I finally broke down at a parent-teacher conference and signed the papers to get him evaluated. We have a meeting next week to determine the results, but everyone is on the same page - he's classic ADHD.

He can't sit still for more than a minute. He's impulsive, and thinks nothing of grabbing another child's arm to get them to play. He's having trouble keeping friends because he's so in-their-face. He's super-smart and can DO the work, but he can't focus on what he's supposed to be doing long enough to complete it. At home, he does his math sheets (75 addition or 50 subtraction) in four minutes or less with no more than two mistakes. At school, if he completes ten problems in the five minutes they're allotted, it's a minor miracles. At home, he's reading Harry Potter with no issues at all. At school he can't manage to pass a five question test on a Dr. Seuss book. I realize the problem is the distractions that a social environment presents, and his inability to tune out those distractions. But it's to the point where I can't get rid of the knot in my stomach when it's time to pick him up after class.

I've always been anti-medication, but we've tried it all. Counseling, behavior modifications, rewards, consequences, charts, point systems...I don't know what else to do. He's a bright, amazing, outgoing child, and it kills me to see all of that slipping away because of the ADHD. At home, he's smart-mouthed and indignant with me, wild and reckless with my two younger daughters...my husband is the only one he'll listen to. He's taken over homework time because Quinton just won't do it for me. I feel powerless to help him, and at the same time, while I love him unconditionally, I just don't LIKE him very much right now.

Does anyone have any suggestions that might work until we can get a diagnosis and start straightening things out medically? I don't want to punish him for what he can't control, but at the same time, I can't give him a get out of jail free card and say "You have a problem so you can do whatever you want without consequences." I've tried several online support groups, but I never seem to get any advice. At this point, I'm willing to try just about anything.

I just want my sweet little boy back!

[kendra1417]

Jan. 20, 2010 at 12:11 AM

Trying looking up an ADHD diet, I don't remember which site I went to but it did help my younger son a little bit. Also I don't know what your routine is, I'm sure you let him outside plenty but try increasing that running around time. I didn't like medication either of my sons but it has helped them 100%.

GOOD LUCK!!