I Knew It

[Fistandantalus]

Six years ago, we saw the ultrasound that proved that we were having a girl in blatant defiance of my belief that we were having another boy.  My husband and mother and I went out to lunch after the appointment and began discussing names for the little goofball.  My mother favors names like "Helen" and "Ruth" while my husband prefers names like "Arwen" and "Polgara".  Because the two of them were bickering and I'd already managed to steal most of their french fries out from under them, I suggested we name the kid "Pepsi Comcast" just to illustrate the ridiculousness of the argument.  We eventually settled on naming the kid "MaryJane", but years later, it seems I was righter than I knew.

MaryJane adores Pepsi.  She will hang around anyone with a Pepsi nearby and say "I wish I could have Peeeepsi.  Maybe just a teeny seeeerving of Peeeeeepsi?"  She will sneak into my room early in the morning, telling her brother "I'm going to snuggle Mom", when in reality what she's doing is copping the last two ounces of warm flat Pepsi from the can I didn't finish the night before. 

I've been sick for the last few days.  I was NyQuilled out on the couch at 6:00am yesterday morning with an almost full can of Pepsi on the table near me.  At some point, I realized that there were children poking me with Lego People Parts to make sure I was still alive because I'm quite sure I looked deader than a smelt.   "Wha?  Nooberquishgnar?  Kids?  Poke?  What's up?  Hey, where's my Pepsi?"  The can of Pepsi was gone.  MaryJane appeared as guilty as I appeared dead.  "MaryJane, did you take my Pepsi?"

"I don't want to discuss it." (the kid is five and she sounds like Oliver North)

"Whaddaya mean you don't want to discuss it, where's my Pepsi?"

"I don't want to discuss the Pepsi!  It's just gone!"

"It's gone because you drank it, right?"

"I reject your reality and substitute my own."  (thanks, Mythbusters)

"MaryJane, I'm sick, ravaged by germs in all ways, and you just chugged a can full of 'em so when you start firing your cannons out both ends, don't come crying to me!"

"Okay, I won't be crying when I come to you."  (she is so her Daddy's kid)  "Mom?"

"What?"

"If I do get sick, can I have my own Pepsi?"

Way to look at the bright side, kid.

[MSugarKane]

Jan. 21, 2010 at 8:02 AM

LOL!

[Mama0f3grlz]

Jan. 21, 2010 at 8:10 AM

I gotta say, I love the name Mary Jane. AND she has great taste. I have a Pepsi addiction myself. :)

[SalemWitchChild]

Jan. 21, 2010 at 9:15 AM

ROFL. How cute! I don't normally agree on giving children soda. But give that girl a can for cuteness. hehe. Sierra use to sneak sips of our pop too. I'm notorious for leaving half drank pops sitting around.

[LovesmyJesus]

Jan. 21, 2010 at 11:22 AM

that is hilarious

[briarraindancer]

Jan. 21, 2010 at 11:58 AM

This is actually why we switched from cans to bottles--you can screw the bottle cap on so tight that little fingers are simply incapable of removing the only obstacle between them and sugar induced comas.

And "I don't want to discuss it," sounds very like what I hear these days: "I'm not having this conversation with you." Oh reeeeally???

[HistoryMamaX3]

Jan. 21, 2010 at 2:40 PM

Um- has she been substituting reality with her own long? lol  Maybe she is her mother's child more than you think.

 

*backs away*

[tericared]

Jan. 21, 2010 at 9:41 PM

That was beautiful....

[KristiS11384]

Jan. 21, 2010 at 9:49 PM

 

Jan. 21, 2010 at 11:40 AM

Um- has she been substituting reality with her own long? lol  Maybe she is her mother's child more than you think.

 

 

THIS ^^^^^

[briannasmom2]

Jan. 22, 2010 at 11:35 AM

Very cute.

[mlregalado]

Jan. 22, 2010 at 11:41 AM

Oh lord, that's funny!

Sounds like my baby girl. She just turned 2 and had an accident the other day. I asked her if she went pee and she told me "It's probably water" "from chair in kitchen". she even paused, thought about it and continued with the part about the chair.