We have decided not to take our sons' teacher so seriously.

[CCCs]

yesterday karly came home with a note from Brayden's teacher... that is right BRAYDEN'S teacher because they were afraid that Brayden wouldn't bring it home.  i have asked them NOT to do this because it causes problems between my children and it is NOT karly's responsability to tell me what my son did wrong that day.  they have my telephone number, if it was so bad they can call me. 

Both of the boys are made to sit next to the teacher's aid ALL day.  they don't start sitting in their own chair, and then have to be moved there... THEY START THERE, because the teacher already expects them to be bad.  and lets be honest if a teacher expects a child to be bad, the child is going to be because they haven't been given the chance to be good!

when the teacher's aid brings one of the boys out she is constantly comparing the two.  "Bryce has been so good, if i can just get Brayden to be that way"  WTF? does she compare the other kids in the class to one another? why the fuck would she do it with mine?  JUST BECAUSE THEY LOOK ALIKE DOES NOT MEAN THEY ARE THE SAME KID!  and not only that it causes resentment between my children!

she sent a note home yesterday for Brayden.  he got into trouble for passing gas in class when he knows that he was supposed to go to the bathroom. he was disrespectful to the teacher and the teacher's aid.  got into trouble for continously getting out of his chair. and had his playtime and his computer time taken away.

now... they have a bathroom in the class room.  i asked him why he was getting out of his chair and he said to go to the bathroom.  WTF. so he gets into trouble for not going to the bathroom and then gets into trouble for trying to go to the bathroom???

and as far as him being disrespectful, we had a long talk about this.  he is making noises in class because he is bored.  i have already talked with the teacher about this.  he is smart and catches onto things quickly.  when she starts going on about something that he already knows then he tunes her out and does his own thing.  he is too young to understand that other kids haven't picked up on it yet.  i have made SEVERAL suggestions on how to handle it.  one is give him busy work... and i'm not talking regular pre school busy work.  he loves math and can already to addition and subtraction problems.  i suggested doing this while she needs to talk to the class.  as far as i can tell she has not done ANY of my suggestions and is content with the teacher's aid constantly getting onto him... and he does NOT like the teacher's aid... i wouldn't either she is a bitch.

i have bent over backward to do all i can to help out including splitting them up between morning and afternoon which has completely worn me out.  i'm through fighting with my son over this because now i'm not so sure that the teacher is giving them the chance they disserve.

lol sorry so long, but i'm pissed... between thier teacher and karly's teacher i'm about at my wits end.  i can't wait for next year when they all will be getting new teachers and Karly's old teacher has already spoken up that she wants BOTH of the twins in her class next year.  WE LOVE THIS TEACHER and we are going to do anything we can to get them in there.  she is the #1 rated kindergarten teacher in the state! 

[NannyB.]

Feb. 5, 2010 at 10:13 AM

Sounds like you are blaming everyone but the children for their bad behavior and disrespect is disrespect, no matter whether you like the teacher or not.  Just wondering if you've ever tried spanking their rear ends for being disrespectful and/or disobedient.  If they don't respect at home, they will not respect anywhere else either.  Love has to be tough in situations like this, and the fact that you are blaming the teacher is not a good sign.  Lived next door to a situation just like yours when my children were little.  All are adults today, and the neighbor's children are living very sad lives, mostly because they were not held accountable for their actions. 

[CloudWeaver]

Feb. 5, 2010 at 10:19 AM

Well as one half of a twin I know what you are going thru. The teachers always wanted to separate us. They finally did in our second year of kindergarden. Needless to say, some of our closeness went away never to return. 

Yet I would ask this Teacher would she like to be thought of as bad right off the bat? Would she like to be compared to another? This is a form of discrimination. Tell her that if she has a problem with doing her job why is she doing it in the first place? That to do these things is only going to form resentment among your children. That there will be notes sent home with whatever child. Not from one child's teacher to another sibling. Then ask her why she hasnt followed up on your suggestions? For you have been their mother longer than she has been their teacher.  Stick to your guns for you know your children their strengths and weaknesses. You can make them thrive and flourish in a good way. I know by experience. My oldest son was done this way from 2nd grade. Til finally in seventh grade he listened to me. Turned his grades from D's and F's to A's and B's without the help of those educated people! He was told he'd never make it in the military. Whereas the other kids in his class went on to college. Yet by the following December after graduation they returned home never to return to college. Whereas he went into the military almost a year after graduation. He has flourished and now is happily married.

So I hope this shows you the power of a Mother. How you can make the difference. I hope this helps as it was meant too.

Have a great day!:)

[CCCs]

Feb. 5, 2010 at 10:27 AM

Nanny B... we have been very strict on our kids over all this.  every little note every little comment has been met with spankings, groundings and what not.  we have bent over backwards to help this teacher do her job.  i'm not one of those parents who feel that once i drop my kid off i don't have to deal with it.  but the more i LISTEN to MY children and the more i talk to the OTHER teachers in this school i'm beggining to see that this teacher DOES NOT have the patience to understand that children will be children.  what a she finds disrespectful is just a child being a child in most parents' views.  she does not have children and i do not think that she understands that they aren't little adults.  i have learned that she expects way too much from the kids in her class.  again i have heard this from TEACHERS.  so please tell me again how i'm the lazy parent who is blaming the teacher.

and thank you cloudweaver, it has been increasingly difficult to get this teacher and aid to understand that what they are doing is causing resentment between my children.

(Original Poster)

[tropicalmama]

Feb. 5, 2010 at 10:41 AM

Have you considered going to the principal or whoever is in charge of the teacher regarding her sending the notes home with siblings? I would. I would go to whoever is superior to her and explain to them that she is causing resentment and problems in your home life and that you need them to work with you to make it stop. Also, is there another class they could be put in, so they wouldn't even have to deal with her anymore? That would be another option that I would look at. I completely disagree with NannyB. Reading what you wrote, I knew exactly how you felt. My oldest had a teacher like that in kindergarten...he got in trouble once and from then on she just assumed that he was a bad kid and always doing wrong...which he did, since he figured if he was in trouble anyway...you know? It can be hard dealing with difficult teachers. But you'll get through...have confidence in yourself and your family. Things are tough now but they'll get better.

[lovelily79]

Feb. 5, 2010 at 10:44 AM

He's in flippin PRESCHOOL, I have never heard of a kid getting in trouble for farting. Just ridiculous you can't control that especially a child, burps yeah maybe I can understand cause you can quietly do that but a fart........I hope her ass wears out for being so up tight she shits herself when she turns into an old hag, karma's a bitch    

[CCCs]

Feb. 5, 2010 at 10:55 AM

unfortunately she is the only pre school teacher in the school.  i think things will be better once they reach kindergarten, we are really going to push for my dd's old kindergarten teacher because she has a great understanding of children and is VERY patient.

(Original Poster)