Roll With Me Opening Night 4

[Amorentia]

Sara POV 

Walking up onto the stage, I tried not to let my nerves get the better of me, knowing singing for real, from the heart, was a whole lot different than drunk karaoke.  I was glad I wasn't doing it alone.  I sat on the edge of the stage, Cambry, Josh, and Asher picking up thier guiters and sitting on the stools around me, Josh starting the count and they began to play.  I just closed my eyes and let the music take me.

Reg POV

I sat in the chair with a drink in my hand and Tori holding the other, watching Sara's face soften as she sang, her eyes closed at first and then opening as she relaxed more, smiling as she swayed, tapping her foot against the wall of the stage, her eyes randomly flickering across the crowd and more often than not, landing on J for just a fraction longer than anyone else.  She wasn't holding it all in the way she'd been doing most of the night, but she wasn't being completely Sara either.  She was obviously becoming more used to the new skin she'd created for herself, and if it hadn't have been for watching her dance with J earlier, I really would have been afraid we were on the verge of losing her completely.  This needed to stop.  Turning to look at our group, I said queitly,  "This is exactly why all this is bothering me.  Seeing her here tonight, seeing her not being her.  Up there on the stage, it's the closest to her she gets and even that's diluted." shaking my head, I took a drink, wondering if anyone other than me and Little Bit saw the potential danger in this situation, "It's like watching a caged bird.  One of two things is gonna happen here.  Either the cage she's in is going to break her spirit and she'll learn to exist with the bars, killing the part of her that longs to fly.  Or, you have that moment where you go in and you see the bird dead at the bottom of the cage, and it's not cause you didn't feed it, and it's not cause it didn't have toys or because you didn't take care of it.  It died because it couldn't adapt, because it was lonely and it missed the freedom to spread it's wings and just be.  Does  that make sense?"

Peni POV

The grieving feeling inside of me deepened. I'd been where Reg described Sara being. My heart was conflicted between it not being my business, and my concern for Sara, Blaise, and Jalil. Watching Sara, I could see what Reg was saying. "Blaise has talked to us more tonight than Sara has. Are we that bad of an influence."

Tori supressed a smile, I knew we could be horrible sometimes. Reg spoke before she did saying, "She's trying to kill her spirit.  Having fun with us doesn't help that."

Searching Marcus's face, I was seeking some guidance on the whole situation. The nosey part of me wanted to pull Blaise aside to have a heart to heart about Sara. If anyone could get through to him, I knew I could. But what if me telling him caused more problems?

Personally I could relate to Reg's analogy. My first two marriages exemplified variations of his story. Resting my head on Marcus's arm, I knew it was inside him that I found freedom. I begin thinking out loud, "It never ends well. No, wait. I can't say that. If nothing interferes, people can live a very ordinary, peaceful existence like that. Maybe if they have never felt freedom before. If those who were born in captivity and don't know the difference are perfectly fine with that life. But if they have tasted freedom..."

"She looks like she knows the difference," Tori said definitively. "She doesn't look happy."

My husbands have rubbed over my back, "Isn't it her choice how she wants to live?  Who are we to interfere?" 

Reg seemed agitated by that answer replying, "You do remember if she hadn't interfered in your life, you wouldn't have Peni, right?"

Marcus got quiet. I swallowed a response. There was a series of events around us that lead us to each other: Blaise choosing to leave, me needing to fulfil my oath to bare another Pack baby, and Sara choosing Reg over Marcus. Lessor actions around those situations continued to effect the course our relationship took. But we were Ancestor picked for each other. His Mother's decisions almost completely undid the fact that our Ancestor's carved us for each other from birth. Our hard work, and choices together, are what rebuilt that connection.

The decisions two people make together are what build their relationships no matter who breaks up with them or introduces them. It's the daily work both participants invest in the relationship that make it thrive. That lead me to look at my hand again to remind myself this situation with Sara and Blaise was none of my business. I don't know what's best for Blaise or Sara; like Blaise, Sara, Reg, nor anyone knows what's best for Marcus and myself. They are the masters of their own destiny and will work things out as they see fit.

Still the analogy of the caged bird got me. I explained, "I don't know. I mean, I was like that with Neville. I really thought I was happy until I got together with Blaise and saw the difference. Then I thought I was happy till Marcus came along and let me out of my cage. I could never happily go back in." Reading my hand again, I argued with myself in my head that Sara's not being held against her will. She's making her own choice. That should be respected.

Tori POV

People like Reg and I were Proactive. We preferred action over inaction any day. Reg was not happy with that answer, "So, the group consensus is to just let her suffer and hope she comes out okay with this in the end? We lose our friend, she learns to settle for what she's got, and we call it a day?"

Peni held up her "not my business, I love Marcus" hand laying out her stance, "The group consensus is that it's not of our business. If she wants to choose to live like this, we have to let her try, and support her choice. Then be here ready if and when she needs us."

"I don't remember voting in that poll," I annouced to the table. Because I disagreed.

Looking to Marcus for his opinion, Peni questioned, "Right?"

Rubbing his hand over his face, I almost thought I sensed a divide in Marcus like he was reluctantly agreeing for Peni's sake when he answered, "Right." 

After placing a kiss on my shoulder, Reg had enough finishing, "I'm glad that works for you guys.  I care too much to let her kill herself for him.  I'm grabbing a drink." We worked too hard on Scrappy and J, seeing our work flourish into happiness for them both, to let that be undone with Sara stomping herself into oblivion so she could be trampled on by Blaise.

Marcus POV

Peni turned to me with a troubled look on her face, asking, "Right? I mean, what are we supposed to do? If anyone had gotten into my business in either of my marraiges, i would have pushed them further away. Or cut them off. I know Sara's about as stubborn as I am."

I thought over the things she'd said, the things Reg said, and the things I knew.  I had been in J's shoes once upon a time, the guy vying for her attention, but in place of Blaise has been Reg.  I had tried to be her friend, the one she could come to, and it had turned into more.  My fear was this would have the same outcome. "You know what I know?  I know I tried to come between her and Reg.  She went with him anyway in spite of it all, because it's what she thought was right, what she needed to do.  Either this will blow up or it won't, but either way, as long as she has her mind stuck on it being what she needs to do, it's what she'll do."

"That's what I thought." Peni said nodding, "She has to come to it on her own or we could lose a friend in the long run. I mean, whose to say they aren't just getting through a rough patch? If we tried to interfer now, when they work it out, they would want us around because we weren't supportive." I watched her hold out her hand with the 'none of my business' charmed across it. 

Brushing a kiss against her head, I looked back towards the stage, following Sara's eyes as she sang, 'You were mine, somewhere in time, I'll look for you first somewhere in time' from our seats, you could almost feel the longing in the air as her eyes met J's, the two of them denying themselves something, even if it was just an incrediable friendship.

Blowing out a breath, I placed a soft kiss over the words on Peni's hand, telling her,  "One way or another, it'll work itself out." her eyes followed mine back to her brother, seeing him lost in thought as he continued to watch her closely, I shook my head while Peni nodded, placing a kiss against my cheek and leaning over to bite my ear.  Turning to grin at her, I knew, whatever happened, we'd be good.

[Amorentia]

Feb. 6, 2010 at 1:08 PM

Ab, Sara, Reg, Marcus, Malik, Josh, Asher, Cambry, Em, Tavish, Roland, Charisma, Brayden, and Morgan written by SHTTEREDPRNCES

Peni, Jalil, Blaise, John written by AMORENTIA

Margaux written by LOUISANAGIRL761

Ashlin and Sirius written by WVMOM06

Serena and Jared written by CIERRASMOM1700

 

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(Original Poster)

[mountainluvnmom]

Feb. 6, 2010 at 6:35 PM

This was great ladies!  Really great!  Everything added together to seem like a fun party and I liked the ending with the four of them discussing the rest of the group, showing the two very different mindsets, both of which make sense.  Peni and Marcus have very much turned into the minds of reason in the group, and I love it and thier sweet grounded nature.  What a perfect match!