She is absolutely stunning.

I have never experienced such weight, such solidity as my minutes old daughter, so recently encased in my  womb, now laying on my chest. For the first time, my new-found maternity feels real. I am a mother.

She rests on the now flat plane of my stomach, right above the near fatal wound haphazardly stapled together. I wonder when, where, some doctor thought himself clever to improvise when lacking in needles and string by utilizing office equipment. The thought does not comfort me, and I find the empty, tender feeling of my abdomen disconcerting. 

I examine every part of this creature, mingled curiosity and fear etched across my dazed features. Soft strawberry blonde hair lays straight and downy on her perfectly formed head. Her eyes are closed, as they have been since we met, and I can see the veins finely mapped on her paper-thin eyelids. It surprises me to note that she has neither eyebrows or eyelashes. I feel like someone, somewhere would have mentioned how alien and hairless a human baby is. Like those weird naked Chihuahua’s that socialites take everywhere with them in pink polka dotted purses. The symmetry intrigues and disgusts me. 


My eyes rove her face and head--so tiny as she is--and I feel so unseemly, so large, so clumsy. The soft spots in her head are pulsing slightly, like something out of a science fiction movie. Luckily, in my opinion, I avoided the bizarre cone-shaped head associated with birth. There are perks to every thing, I suppose. Her rosy lips are pulled into a pout, a harbinger in my eyes to a surly and disagreeable child. Those frail eyelids flutter open, and for the first time, our eyes meet--smoky green gray with rich chocolate-y brown--and those pouty lips pull up in a glimmer of a smile. 

She doesn’t look surly to me. 

The pregnancy itself was a blur--sonograms, nurseries, bickering about names and dreading how this child would eventually make it’s appearance (and the method that it would choose). Now, after months long journey, I have but one thought--


She is absolutely stunning. 

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Comments:

goatmom4
Oct. 5, 2010 at 7:42 PM

what a cool way of writting that   you should write          she will love this when she is older    awesome duduehappy halloween

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