My Philosophy on Cheating

[FuzNet]

If you have been on Café Mom for even a minute you will know that subject of cheating comes up a lot, and it got me thinking: What would I do if my husband cheated on me?

Up until recently I had a long standing philosophy that many of my girlfriends disagreed with.  This philosophy was:

If you cheat on me, your bad not mine.  End the affair; rededicate your life to me, fine.  But don't tell me about the affair.  Why devastate my life and punish me because of your bad behavior.  Unless someone else is going to tell me, in that case I would rather hear it from you.

But thanks to drama on Café Mom I realized: Most people cheat because there is a problem with their relationship. Hopefully my husband and I have a good enough relationship that we would come to one another to work things out before going so far as cheating.  But if we don't, no matter how much it would hurt, I would rather know: This way if we still feel there is hope for our relationship we can work on fixing it instead of hiding and lying.

Oh sure there are few amoral people out there that do whatever they want with no thought to how it might hurt people (my husband is definitely not one of these).  But I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone who is that much of a scumbag.  So again, tell me.  So I can move on.  

[sati769leigh]

Feb. 17, 2010 at 5:26 PM

i think you have a great way of looking at it