Morning Issues

[sweetpea532]

I get asked a lot about how my kids are..usually by therepists, social workers and doctors. I get asked to state my definition of normal. My daughter is very delayed. To me she is normal. I get to see her reach milestones. Just a whole lot later than a " normal" kid would. Now she can stand for a little bit just holding one of my hands. She started doing that this morning. She is 21 months old.

Carter says about 12 words. He is three. Cole says about 10 words. He is three also. Carter can kick a ball. He started doing that about a month ago.

One time in sure anger with all the labeling that seems to happen in regards to my kids. I told a ped" Well if a new person comes in your home and sees your dog eating off the kitchen table and noone does anything...because that is normal for the dog to do that. Are you really going to point that out?" Normal is such a dumb term in my book. What is normal? One may think what happened to me on the bus the other day is normal. ( When that guy told me to talk quieter when I was on my phone and then messed with a baby in a stroller) One may think running around in a diaper in the summer time is normal. I don't permit my kids to do that. So I wouldn't view that as normal. Or it may be normal to let your 4 year old kid to have a Coke with his meal. Just because my kids don't ever drink soda...doesn't mean that isn't normal. Just not normal for my house.

In my short time having three special needs kids. I have noticed that a lot of people have a job ( that pays money) that entails judging how I and others raise their kids. Because their protocol states that certain things are or aren't the right way. Whose way? I mean seriously. Who are they to judge that Carter is flighty? Or that Cole is socially delayed? When did a kid being a kid become a handicap? Don't get me wrong..I know there are some delays. But when did kids come with manuals? I know at three Austin ( my oldest) was on the computer and could talk full sentances. So? So what if my kids need a little more attention? Aren't they entitled..I mean come on a kid is only a kid for so long.

I am going to start labeling the people I encounter..especially with the therepy part of their lives. The "wicked witch" who never has had a kid but thinks because she has a degree she knows how to raise my daughter better. The " brown noser" who makes like she is on my side but writes crap in my daughter's file that I am hard to get along with.

The " mom who rocks" because she loves her kids to the moon and back. She would fight a bear with a spatula and a Zoo Pals fork if she had to. That's me if you didn't guess. lol

[Sara-Amelia]

Feb. 18, 2010 at 10:48 AM

Wow that is alot for one mom to handle.  I hope that some more of the professionals you deal with in the future have compassion.  It sounds as though the ones you have dealt with so far haven't had enough compassion.  Keep being the strong woman that you are. 

[motheroftwo1203]

Feb. 18, 2010 at 1:15 PM

I loved reading this! I couldn't agree more. I have never been a by the book type mother.  It's my parental right and responsibility to raise my children in whichever "normal" atomosphere of which I chose.  And sometimes, normal is having Cheeto's for breakfast.  SO WHAT!  Because I am just like you, DO NOT label my children and DO NOT tell me what I as a mother don't know my children better than you because you sit with a piece of paper staying M.D. above your head.

Again, great journal!  Maybe we will see each other in the same forrest someday fighting those bears with our spatulas and forks! HA

[sweetpea532]

Feb. 18, 2010 at 10:12 PM

Moheoftwo1203: Thank you! I am glad I am not the only one that feels like this! (()))

(Original Poster)