5 days.... (cussing)

[randijj]

 I can't believe we are getting married in 5 DAYS!! The time has flown by so fast. I feel so ready but very unprepared and scared. I'm so nervous, but so excited. I know he's "The One" and I'm anxious to start our new life together. Even though we live with each other and I'm already 3 months pregnant. lol He doesnt think any thing is going to change... I told him it always changes after marriage, and he said only if you let it. And you know what?? He's totally right! I'm just ready for the wedding to be over with. I'm excited for it, but alot of ppl are just ruining it for us right now. I know I shouldnt let them bother me, but good Lord ppl!! This is OUR wedding, NOT YOURS. we will do it how WE WANT IT! And invite and NOT invite ppl we want. Dont tell us who to invite. So Sick of it. We didn't invite his step sisters daughter (she's 18) because we NEVER talk to her. Yes, she lives in the same down as us, but since I have been with Jarred I have met and talked to her once while we were at Jarred's Nieces birthday party. That was MONTHS ago. She's even on my facebook and never talks to me. I post stuff about the wedding all the time, and never says a word to me. So we didnt invite her. Well.... his dad is telling us we HAVE to invite her, we fought with him, blah blah blah. he dropped it. A few days later he says... well She already got a hotel room (we are getting married out of state), I was PISSED!! We didnt send her an invitation. That means you are not invited... dumb people. Then my sister is being dumb. LIKE ALWAYS!  She says I hurt her feelings... We were at mom's house a few weeks ago, and she's bitching about the wedding being out of town. It's less then 2 hours from our town, and about 100 miles. We have other family traveling as much as 2,000 miles for our wedding. I told her it would take $30.00 in gas to get there in back. We are having it early enough to get home before dark. She was still bitching and whining. I told her not to go then, and it wouldnt hurt my feelings. Few weeks go by, I ask her if her boyfriend is going to go. She said no, I said ok.. well you and the boys are coming right? she said no, we have more important things to do. My feelings arent hurt, i'm just pissed because she always plays these lil games. She's stupid, and has to make a scene, and then make it seem like it's all my fault, pitty party for her, wah wah wah. So my mom is pissed at me, Which, I would rather her NOT come because we have never gotten along, and she will just cause problems any ways. SHe's prolly just made because she was SUPPOSE to get married last July and they called it off a week before the wedding. They always fight, they still always fight. So pathetic. I think she's just made that i'm getting married before her. Any ways, Jarred's dad staying with us is driving me crazy! He's been with us for almost 4 weeks now... We try to watch tv, and he sits right in the living room talking loudly on his cell phone all the time. He did it all night last night. Get up... go to your room, or a diffrent room and talk. Good freaking lord. Then I am trying to watch a tv show, and they start talking... I was grumpy any ways because of my ex. but good lord. I soooo regret my ex. I know ppl say never regret shit, blah blah f'en blah. But I can't not regret him. I guess I have learned alot of things while being married to such a loser, and live lesons I learned because of him, and I have a wonderful daughter. But that was the WORST mistake of my life! He's always late on child support, he never sticks to a plan of getting Jordan or dropping her off. He never calls her. but of course when my phone is broken, he wants to talk to her. I told him, I'm "broke" (like he always tells me) and I can't afford a new phone right now. Guess you will have to buy Jordan a phone if you want to talk to her. Divorce papers dont say I have to supply a phone. Just that I can't keep her from him. *shurgs* push me enough and I will become a bitch. I have played nice, I have dont it his way. (like i have ALWAYS) done. Fuck him. I'm tired of his shit.

[Destiny1403]

Feb. 22, 2010 at 9:27 AM

Dont get dragged into all of the drama and enjoy your wedding with your DF and your DD!!!! Everything works out in the end mama!!!!

[leahmbennett]

Feb. 22, 2010 at 1:30 PM

If you ever need me I am here. No, I dont live down the street. But you have my number and I feel your pain. I understand exactlly what you are saying and you know what? Good for you to let the world know exactlly how you are feeling. So many women wouldn't admit that a child was a mistake. We know that you love her, You just wish she came from the man you love today. And I understand what you mean. All of the doctor visits he never payed for, All The late nights he never helped with,  I could go on and on. WE got pregnant, But I have a daughter. My daughter was a mistake, I regret having her with that man. and now I feel so much better to actually say that. But you know what? I love her, she saved my life and God gave her to me. So, It was meant to be. And all of her smiles make all of the unbearable moments a little bit sweeter!

[leahmbennett]

Feb. 22, 2010 at 1:33 PM

p.s. Thanks for making it easier for me to talk about. The world needs more honest ppl like you!

 

[randijj]

Feb. 22, 2010 at 6:59 PM

lol wow... I must have been REALLY grumpy today. I just reread that... wow... I have been grumpy all day. just not a good day for me i guess! lol and you are welcome! You are one of the coolest ladies I have ever met, and you also making talking so easy! Just wish we could take our girls on a play date and have a cup of Joe! lol

(Original Poster)