50 Pounds

I think I got on the scale 3 or 4 times today to make sure I was reading the numbers right. I did it. I really did it. But how? How did I-- little old me, how did I loose 50 pounds?!?What?.... How can this be?...  I love food--and I mean, I LOVE food. Up until recently, it was as if I was handcuffed to the clock, wondering when my next feeding was.

 My mood or frame of mind could change with the idea or topic of what the subsequent meal was... well sometimes it still does excite me that much! My husband adores cooking and is fabulous at it; so when he says he's making his homemade refried beans and green chili- I'm instantly lighter, almost giddy. Oh my---isn't that sad? Ugh.. I feel silly saying that -but it's true. I've always been the one who is borderline, overly energized for birthday parties. Parties meant I get to eat cake-- ok forget the cake, I get to eat icing!!! So needless to say, but I'm a lick the bowl kind of gal. I grew up in a family that has desert at every meal for goodness sake. My family has eaten doughnuts or strudel as desert in the morning after having eggs, hash browns and sausage!  Luckily, most of my family hasn't really ever had real concerns with weight. But for me, after but after babies and getting older, I can't eat like how I used to in my twenties.

Food has also been like a close friend to me as well. When I'm sad, chocolate has lent its beloved ear. Happiness has gone hand in hand with pizza for oh so many years. And mood swings along with hormones like clockwork, call out for late night bowls of cereal each month. I covered my pain with food and before I knew it I actually looked like what I ate; unhappy and unhealthy.

Nowadays I've since learned through my mom, my sister, my friends and wonderful Weight Watchers how to reward or console myself without food. It's remarkable how good it feels to put a new shirt in celebration - and not congratulate myself with three scoops of ice cream or too many Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. I know that some of this may seem obvious to certain people- but for me, it took a while to get all of this. And oh boy, does it feel good!  I still have very strong feelings for food and enjoy eating lots of chocolate; but the trick is now that I've got the jurisdiction with food. Food no longer has authority over me.  

 

Add A Comment

Comments:

momof...
Feb. 22, 2010 at 10:58 PM

congrats on your journey.

Message Friend Invite

Melsboys
Feb. 22, 2010 at 11:01 PM

Love this Jen, voted up!! :) Love you!

Message Friend Invite

Strol...
Feb. 22, 2010 at 11:07 PM

You just pretty much described me too... just beginning my journey.  Congratulations!

Message Friend Invite

MaMas06
Feb. 22, 2010 at 11:47 PM

I'm so proud to be your friend. You're an inspiration to me. Reading your journal has given me a new sense of power over food. I know it will be a difficult journey but I'm up for the challenge!  Thanx for posting this wonderful update of how you've battled the bulge and won!!

Way to go, Jen! whoo hoo! xoxo

Message Friend Invite

rosei...
Feb. 22, 2010 at 11:53 PM

thank you, thank you, thank you!!!! the support and kind thoughts are just amazing!!! ♥

Message Friend Invite (Original Poster)

5pmso...
Feb. 23, 2010 at 12:18 AM

congratulations

Message Friend Invite

itchy...
Feb. 23, 2010 at 1:30 AM

That is SOOOOOOOOOO cool!!!

Good for you, beautiful!

Message Friend Invite

Encha...
Feb. 23, 2010 at 3:18 AM

Congratulations, angel!  You have done something truly amazing!  I am so proud of you!

You look so beautiful, empowered, peaceful, & happy in your photo.  *sigh*  I am soooooooo happy for you, darling!

Keep up the good work!

I'll say a little prayer for you when I do my daily exercise.  *wink* 

Hugs...Ceci

Message Friend Invite

massa...
Feb. 23, 2010 at 4:41 AM

congratulationsyour amazing

Message Friend Invite

catho...
Feb. 23, 2010 at 5:06 AM

Very nice post, and good job on the weight loss.. you are beautiful!

Message Friend Invite

Want to leave a comment and join the discussion?

Sign up for CafeMom!

Already a member? Click here to log in

Advertisement