I finally come to terms with one disappointment, and then there's somethign else again, immediately.
I have offically been diagnosed with diabetes. No argument allowed, considering I was informed by via a letter.
I have been concerned about my blood sugar for about a year. What I started noticing, about this time last year, was a feeling of extreme lethargy after meals. Sometimes it was stumble-to-the-couch-and-collapse kind of extreme.
So I tested my blood sugar a couple times at work, and it was high enough for me to call my doc and have a fasting glucose test done. That test showed I was just a little higher than was is "normal."
I was supposed to go back and re-test, but I was hoping to find private health insurance, so I didn't want to get diagnosed. Instead I started paying attention to my carbohydrate intake and cut down on those, and cut way down on regular "sugar" - in my coffee and in other things, like pop and candy bars and donuts.
I dropped 15 pounds, and the fatigue and lethargy seemed to resolve. I thought I was in the clear.
Yeah... um, no.
I went in for a physical last week, and my A1C was 6.7. An A1C supposedly gives an average blood sugar of the past 3 months. 6.0 - 6.5 is considered diabetic.
Damn it. I can't argue with hard numbers.
So the next hard numbers I will be looking at will be my actual blood glucose levels, (which is a different measurement than the A1C, btw) before meals, 1 hour after meals, 2 hours after meals, and first thing in the morning. And probalby for a few weeks even more often than that. For comparison, a non-diabetic rarely has a post meal blood sugar higher than 125. (Post meal is when blood sugar typically spikes to a high level).
I picked up a great book by Jenny Ruhl called Blood Sugar 101, and this book gives a lot of strategy for learning how to keep blood sugar from ever going higher than 140. The strategy is basically test, test, test... then tweak your meals and test again. Keeping blood sugar from going above 140 is how a person with diabetes keeps their toes, keeps their vision, and prevents kidney damage. This is the big stuff, and the ONLY way to do it is to keep blood sugar levels consistently below 140. Period.
So. I guess I have a new lifetime goal. Because I'm rather attached to my toes, thank you very much. AND my vision. In fact, if I had to give up one or the other... nah, never mind. I'm going to control my blood sugar, so I never even have to go there.
There are many things in my life that I cannot control. Blood sugar is not one of them. So there.