All in the Family

[mamajack824]

  since our family spends alot of the weekdays working to pursue our life goals, such as employment, school, events, and other things that take us from the home and being together. I had made it a "familial requirement" that on Sundays, we as a family MUST be in attandence together for family time and dinner. So,  as the elder, I set the example for my child. So every sunday, we have time together, and we sit down and eat dinner, TOGETHER. this is MANDATORY. Only a national emergency, medial emergency or death, can keep us from this family event. As my family has been separated for many years, due to my military obligations, I spent alot of time being absent.  Though, I made every effort to be there for my child, there were times, the long-term obligations took me, away. However, after suffering two near death experiences, I changed as to what was really important... Not the things or the unimportant events, that did not foster personal support or growth for the members in my family, but for my child and our family. For most parents, who are surrounded by family members in great numbers, they are probably accustomed to seeing their family, frequentl, and some may take this interaction for granted... For some these family members gatherings, bring familial issues, that results in bickering, shouting, grudges, and anger...thus causing separation. Well, last year, I lost my last parent, this time to Alzheimer's, and will this departure from the "real world," I was promotoed to family elder, at age 51, while my own parents did not acquire this heading of growth, until their 799s or 80s! It was from this new place of vision, that I realized, there is a increasing need for parents to grab hold of their children , instead of the possessions, or the things required to keep up with the Joneses. So many, have lost touch with their children, and mechanical and electronic items, have taken their place... It was this parental neglect, that I did not want to leave as a legacy to my child or my family, so I changed, and lead by example. Since I had a foot already in the door to regain my child from the world, it was not exceptionally hard to "get her attention." In fact, at first she tried to be angry at me for not being as attentive to her... But, she gave me the best advise and comments... "mom, I know I have been difficult when you try to reach out to me; I apologize, but it so hard to find out where I am or who I am becoming; however, I am glad that you did not give up on me! You still are there for me, as I try to become me... I really enjoy the dinners and the times we sit and talk, you help me, alot... So thanks!" Well, I guess, for those who believe that our child do not "need," us or just want us to be their friends, first, parents, second... I have evidence that begs to differ, based on the words of semi-adult babes... Because she confirmed, I was on the right track, even when she had the obstacles to hinder the reuniting... Sometimes, I have the children of my friends at my home, because their parents do not have the time; gave up; or just shifted back to their own concerns... For me, I am going to continue these dinners, until, I am too senile to complete the cooking. However, by that time, I hope that dinners will be like in the Jetsons, press a button, and it comes prepared and served byt the robotic maid!! But, for now, I will just enjoy the dishes... 

[ksbondgirl]

Apr. 15, 2010 at 10:09 AM

That was a great read.  I know what you mean about people who live in large families that take family time for granted.  Where I live, I have no family.  Neither does my husband--both our families are too far away.  I try to create family traditions that I would like for my kids to pass on to their own.