PSA about PMS...

[fiveallmineblog]

An open letter to husbands everywhere...

Dear husband

I am writing to you in an effort to help you to understand the things that bother me the most when I am pms'ing.  I know that you know what I am talking about, but just to make it clear, pms is the syndrome that YOU have to deal with before I get my period, prior to me inconveniencing YOU for about a week or so afterwards.

PMS is short for pre-menstrual syndrome, which basically means that my hormones are changing and I am feeling CRANKY. I will be hating myself because of the giant, red pimple that throbs on the end of my nose and the fact that my stomach is bloated like I am about 8 months pregnant with twins.

It is easy to become frustrated, and annoyed when you are pms'ing.  It is not a fun time.

It is my hope that sharing the following information with you will enable us to have a more tolerable ‘pms week'.    The following is a list of factors that can easily annoy me once I have entered this very emotional stage of my cycle:

You, asking if that is a zit on the end of my nose, or if I am changing my name to Rudolph.  (Not funny).

You, commenting that pms is psychological, and just a good excuse to be nasty. (Even with nervous laughter, that is not funny).

You timidly asking if my period is coming.

You, not helping with the kids/dinner/cleanup.

You, helping with the kids/dinner/cleanup.

Your snoring.

Your groping.

Your comments that you know how you can cure my headache.

You, asking if your laundry is done (even if you do need clean underwear to wear to work the next day.)

You, trying to carry on a conversation with me.

You, not trying to carry on a conversation with me.

Okay, upon review of my list, I see some definite patterns here.  Basically, you are damned if you do and damned if you don't.  It would be best if you just kept a safe distance away from me for about 7-10 days each month, only coming close if I beckon to you with a smile and a barbequed steak.

Thanks honey.

Love, me xoxo

PS:  Your sleeping bag is on the couch.

[GothicMama]

Apr. 10, 2010 at 4:22 PM

LOL I love it