So tonight my husband is upstairs getting the kids ready for bed and I hear dh getting loud "Hey watch what you're doing! You're peeing all over! What are ya doin'?!
I holler up from the bottom of the stairs "Hey what's a matta?"
DH: He's peeing all over the place up here! (our 4 y/o)
Me: Oh, okay
DH: Whaddaya mean "ok"?!
Me: Sometimes he gets distracted...help him out some! He does that a lot.
DH: Well I sure hope you clean it up?
Zoinks. What was that your dumb ass let slip out your dumb mouth?! HE (dh) cleaned it up. And when we had the two chillins in bed we had our regular nightly grown-up visit time...at which time I said: You know, he's been peeing in the toilet for over a year now. I have told you before he lacks aim sometimes. Maybe YOU can help him with that, seeing how I don't have a PENIS. DUH!!! And then it hit me, and I told him "It's actually sort of like me expecting you to explain menstruation to our daughter. Booyah. Shut him up right quick. Like how am I sposed to know how to aim a penis? Pffft. Men!
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