Biggest con of a SAHM

[ramzmomma]

You know how lonely it can get to be a SAHM?

Don't get me wrong - I enjoy playing and seeing my child all day - everyday.

But there is definally's Con's to it. My biggest con is I have no friend's anymore. They all (which I really never had many) disappeared after having my daughter. And they definally stay away now i'm pregnant again.
It get's sooo lonely. Expecially when my husband goes out with the guys once a week - and I don't go anywhere.. EVER. I haven't been out with the girls.. or heck been out by myself.. in 18 month's.

And sometimes a woman need's a little time off... and I just never get that. I feel like i'm just wasteing my life with no friend's. I just want to have someone I can call up and say "Let's go for coffee.. " or meet up for lunch with.

Hmmm :-/

 

[CheshireHope]

Apr. 17, 2010 at 12:56 PM

your friends weren't much of friends to begin with if they just disappeared after you had your 1st child.

i have the same set or friends from middle school through high school. i get lonely too when my husband goes to work but he is the one that doesn't have any friends. so i know for a fact he feels the same pain you have.

have you tired to a play date group in you area? that might help you out .

keep your head up. if ya ever need to talk feel free to drop me a line.

[thebailiffs]

Apr. 17, 2010 at 1:18 PM

Have you tried http://www.meetup.com/? They have wonderful mommy groups.  Now there will be drama in a group but you just put in your zip code and there are any groups in your area.  Try to reach out and make some new friends that have children the same age.

I moved when I was 8 1/2 months preggo and now all of my new friends all have children the same age as my son. I have a few other friends from growing up but not many.

Good luck!

P.S. That is why I went back to work and my son is in preschool. They are our friends.

[dwinkie72]

Apr. 18, 2010 at 8:23 AM

i feel your pain, probably more than anyone. lol im a sahm who also homeschools her children.  the kids and i have lots of fun together. we go on fieldtrips, meet with other homeschoolers.  basically, when i leave the house the kids are with me.  recently my husband had been laid off.  i can stay home 24/7 with my kids, just not my husband lol.

i realized i needed to start doing things for myself to give me, me time.  i went and got a manicure. loved it because there were not kids, no hubby and no drama lol.

[bugsandpirates]

Apr. 18, 2010 at 8:39 AM

This is the most common issue with SAHM.  There just has to be an extra effort on your part to create a social life that doesn't involve your children. 

When my first was about three, I signed him up for a library program and pre-school.  It was there that I was able to talk to adult moms.  Some grew into friendships, others just remained friendly aquantices.

I would try to the meetup.com site too, get into playgroups and hopefully a friendship will grow over a period of time through your children playing with other children.

Many times there are book clubs in the area or quilting etc.  Try to get  involve in one activity that is just for you once a month.  This give you an opportunity to talk to other adults without your children.  Another option, if your not tight on money, is take a class.  A yoga class, jazz class, or a academic class.

As you can see it takes a little more effort to create mommy time and hopefully friendships will develop.