My life story. mi vida loca HA

[chelleluvxander]

Quoting seaglassblu:

Can I politely ask what kind of cancer you had?  Cancer diagnosis and treatment is a terrible thing to go through, and now the rape.  I hope you are alright.  Keep us updated, okay?  Good luck to you.

I have a tumor on the right side of neck, just had all the lymph nodes and mass removed from the right side of my abdomen... still have to wait for the surgery on my neck, we need more imagery then a consult from a dif surgeon than the one I just had

And for those who thimk i'm crazy, u should see me off my meds HA! I do have PTSD, I do have fibro, I do have RA (it affects everyone differently, so I am tired) all the 3 I just mentioned are almost always paired with one or the other, or all three. I was born 8wks early 4lbs 5 oz.... I do have a bad back -sacralization of the fifth lumbar and first sacral seg- very paiful... broke my foot thrice in the last two years, tore my medial meniscus in my right knee... yes I am almost 24 and did have a heart attack, not a stroke found that out prior to my recent surgery, Mercy Hos. overdosed me on potassium chloride.... think i'm crazy? Don't stalk my journals why not get my credit report and medical bills. My son is Autistic or has Aspergers which ever you'd prefer, chk him out as well. He also has sensory processing disorder, and behavioral problems. My daughter is fine... thought she was twins becus they 'run' in my family and she was lyin transverse had my OB confused for a moment as well. At about 37wks an US saud she was small and they changed my due date 3 wks then i had a high leak didnt know for 6 days, she was born 3 hrs from my orig dd, makn her a preemie becus of the dd swutch. k? Now, I am married been together for 7yrs... its complicated.... so i went out w friends from school (thats right im gettn my masters) so, I never made it to the bar... my memories are very fuzzy but i remember when he punched in the face and wakn up @ 9am no clothes, no purse w all my meds, money, ID, credit cards... u get it. So, how do I know i was raped? becus i was so sick w/o my meds i layed in bed all wkend, and his stuff came outta me 2days later, gross? You wanted it all correct??? Then, i went to the dr about 4wks later, 2 days later i get a call my blood test said pos for preg. everyone else has done hcg urine, this was an Afb test which is i posted itpos Afb and no hcg could mean probs or twins... yes i thought my girl was twins but i was wrong just as i could be with this, it may not be twins but I am pregnant, all i was wanting to know drama freaks is if the nice knowedgable women knew anything about this or had been thru it? THX and this is just the internet... i have probly 50 journals what do u do all day.... you coulda been reading Ebooks instead.... whose watchn your kids or are u that bored @ work? BTW, I found a great job that works w my health (including great ins) and my doctor visits. Before you judge my over my 'gut feelings' or other women, take a step back and think what hard working great moms we all are and how much those kids look up to us, if you talk about other women in front of your children, is your son going to respect them or your daughter going to be a 'mean girl'.... I am a great friend and great mom, and used to be a great wife, I am not afraid to hide these flaws, who wouldn't be excited and look for answers,support,and other opinions when they thought they had great news? Bashing posts are the highlights of your day and that's sad ): FYI I was severly beaten as a child, emotionally abused , molested by my father, in and out of homeless shelters, kicked out on my 17th bday, my mom is bipolar scizophrenic and an ex meth addict... my dad was a drug dealer. they passed us along back n forth during binges... school was a nightmare til i got a job @ 15 walked to and from everyday. workd on abg 35hrs a wk my senior year and was prom queen.... look it ALL UP PLEASE!!! I came from nothing, my babies will never endure anything I had to go through that is why I stay married to my best friend even if the love isn't always the way it was.... Now your turn, tell mr about your perfect lil life. Oh one more thing my baby I lost at 14wks nov.28th 09... i was told i wasnt pregnant 3 wks before that so i didnt go to the doctor till the next evening, and almost needed a blood transfusion because Im anemic... Im not the only young person to have health problems.... I just have anxiety and obviously share with the wromg people? Thx.... left a lot out like 10 siblings, molested three other times by my mothers boyfriends at 12 and 13, finally told her last year after she got clean... I just cannot believe but expected for everyone to think I was nuts bcus evie obviously wasn't twins.... I was wrong, k? sry... doesn't any get that this more than me hoping but more about me looking 4mon @ 9wks??? 

[sati769leigh]

Jun. 18, 2010 at 5:42 AM

Honestly I really do not know what to think, I wont even pretend. I hope that what ever it isyou are wishing for, looking for, happens and that you find some much needed peace . I strongly suspect you have much deeped issues than PTSD honey. your posts, this journal post, reads like bi-polar manic episode. which concerns me for you. How is your husband handling all this? since you were raped? and now you might be pregnant as  a result? that has to be very hard on your mariage. I hope for all your sakes that you and he both are getting some professional help with this.

[butterflysmom]

Jun. 18, 2010 at 3:11 PM

YOu are a very brave lady I wish u only the best my dear been though HELL and back so have I andn as u get older   u learn to deal with things different ly I know

[DacieArie]

Jun. 18, 2010 at 8:17 PM

I really hope you get the support you need, this post really, really scares me. I hope your doc can help you out with all of this.