hmmm

[TheFringe]

 was thinking about starting a blog but don't know anything about how to get started or what to write about etc. my life is always an (although typically only for fleeting moments) or insane on levels that would blow some peoples minds. i actually prefer  the crazy. boring makes me cranky. not having a book to read makes me cranky. currently what is making me crazy is church.

i need to find one. that works for my entire family. for awhile we attended a nearby church. the kids were super involved with the other kids there, we did homeschooling co-op with the other families, my husband volunteered with the elementary kids on Weds. and i volunteered with the teens. the children's program is the ONLY thing at this particular church that is currently working. anyway, everytime i brought up the subject of making changes to the youth group i was told that "we have prayed about this considerably and feel that this is the direction God wants us to take". while on the one hand i understand that the approach just wasn't working. the approach being:have an opening worship time, game or group activity, then disect the sermon from Sunday. well of course the kids who don't attend church had no idea or opinion on what was discussed on Sunday mornings. the kids who do attend church didn't want to go over the sermon again. for the kids who attend both Sunday morning services and weekly small groups they were getting the sermons 3x's per week!

another issue was the division in the youth. there were the kids who attended church on Sundays, were family oriented, and basically did well in school, life, etc. then there were those kids on the "fringes" of society. comming from broken homes, drinking or doing drugs, already having sex, completing tanking in school. talking about Sundays sermon was off putting to say the least. that's not to say that the KIDS shunned each other by any means. it was the staff! they weren't interested in learing their stories except to tell them that everything would be ok. God would make life right. again i understand that part of the clergy's job is to spread the Word and i think that's great. and youth group is a place to do that. but for some jumping in with both feet about God freaks them out.

sorry got off track...so i had suggested, more than once, that we start talking about revelvant issues for all kids. cutting, drugs, sex, peer relationships, etc. staff wasn't even aware that more than one member of their youth group cut. one was being sexually molested by her step dad. and one hoodlum, who did not attend youth group, was outside SELLING POT while everyone else was inside. i went inside to let the youth pastor know what was going on, and two members of the board, and they did NOTHING!!!!! literally continued to stand there and carry on the conversation they were having.

so now, a year later, i have been blackballed. i'm not allowed to work with the youth. people think that because i give the kids on the "fringes" a safe place to stay when things get really bad that i allow drinking, drugs, and sex to happen in my house. they don't see the late night conversations about this being just the beginning of their lives and that sometimes things get done to them but they can make better decisions in how to react to the crap their handed.

and now they've started having conversations about sex-a woman from the local pregnancy clinic came in to talk about safe sex and alternatives to abortion, etc. they are going to show the film To Save A Life that deal with teen sucide, cutting, and teen pregnancy. what the hell.

yeah, this post has been ALL OVER THE PLACE!!!!!! in between trying to type i'm keeping track of 12 different teen conversations, giving my daughter permission to stay at a friends house, and my 13 year old having a tantrum because i won't make him food.