The Struggle To be Better For Your Children

[magical_mommy]

 OK SO HERE IS MY ISSUE MY BOYFRIENDS MOTHER WELL I HAVE BEEN WITH HER SON FOR 7 YRS AND WE HAVE TWO SON'S TOGEATHER AND ANOTHER ON THE WAY. I LOVE HIM MORE THAN I CAN TELL HE IS A GREAT GUY BUT HE IS OUT OF WORK THANKS TO THE LACK OF JOBS. WELL WE HAVE TO LIVE IN HIS MOTHERS GARAGE WHICH WAS OK BEFORE WE HAD KIDS NOW THAT WE HAVE KIDS ITS SO HARD TO MAKE ANYTHING WORK CONSTENT CLUTTER AND TENSION. HERE IS THE PROBLEM HIS MOTHER HAS A THREE BEDROOM HOUSE AND REFUSES TO LET US HAVE THE TWO ROOMS INSIDE SHE USES THEM FOR STORAGE. OK NOW SHE SAYS SHE WONT USE THE GARAGE BECAUSE HER THINGS DON'T BELONG IN STORAGE. OK FINE FINE BUT THOSE ROOMS ARE CLUTTERD SHE DOSNT LIKE US . SHES RUDE TO MY OLDER SON SAYS MEAN THINGS TO HIM WE ARE IN A FINACIAL CRISIS AND BARELY GET THE ASSISTANCE WE NEED LET ALONE TO AFFORD OUR OWN PLACE SO BASICLY I AM IN HER CONTROLL BECAUSE IF YOU SAY SOMETHING THAT ISN'T WHAT HER HEAD TELLS HER YOUR GOING AGAINST HER. OK I AM BORDERLINE FREAKING OUT AND DID I MENTION THAT WE AREN'T ABLE TO EVEN AFFORD A CAR SO WE HAVE TO DEPEND ON HER. SHE DIDN'T EVEN WANT TO TAKE ME TO THE HOSPITIAL WHEN I WAS GOING INTO LABOR I HAD TO BEG SOMEONE ELSE TO TAKE ME SHE SAID TO CALL AN AMBULANCE. YEA SHE DID.SO HOW CAN I HANDLE THIS I AM 24 AND MY BF HER SON IS 33 OUR KIDS ARE 4 AND 9 MNTH AND DUE IN FEB I CAN'T HANDLE THIS PLACE I AM LOOSING MY MIND I AM STICKING IT OUT FOR THE SAKE OF MY CHILDREN BUT ...OH AND DID I MENTION THAT HER HUSBAND MY B/F'S FATHER IS PARAPALEGIC AND SHE HAS A BOYFRIEND THATS MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANYTHING ELSE . EVEN HER SICK GRANDCHILDREN. WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WE DON'R GET ENOUGH TO SURVIVE I AM GETTING MY TUBES TIED BECAUSE I WASN'T ABLE TO WITH MY LAST SON. AND REALLY HAVE NO ONE TO TURN TO I CAN'T LET MY KIDS BECOME HOMELESS TO MAKE MY PLACE KNOWN. MY B/F IS LOOKING FOR WORK EVERY SECOND AND WHAT HE DOES FIND IS SIDE WORK AND BARELY MINIUM WAGE SO WHAT CAN I DO BEFORE I SNAP.AHHHHH.

-STRESSED OUT BEYOND BELIEF.

 

[ChicaThis]

Oct. 26, 2010 at 10:14 PM

It sounds like times are tough.  Maybe a shelter is better than living there.  Have you tried renting a place and trying to get roommates.  Maybe you can get enough roommates to pay most of the rent.  Do you have any family?  Have you tried doing side jobs yourself like maybe petsitting or in-home nanny or childcare.  Most moms that are looking for in home care wouldn't mind you bringing your own children if you are good with watching them.  Just some ideas... Good luck!

[Lb128f]

Oct. 27, 2010 at 1:22 AM

Sorry I didn't vote...no choices I liked ;-). Your BF needs to look for "Day Labor" in your city...he can work (a FAIR wage) and get paid the SAME day. And...since you are a "single" Mom...you can file for Social Services and get on the wait list for Section 8 Housing. ALONE there are MANY assistance programs you would qualify for...are you willing to leave your BF to better your life and the life of your children? If a 33 year old man can't find suitable work to help support his family then he needs to take whatever job he CAN find...ANY job. Seriously, something coming in (money-wise) is better than NOTHING. I KNOW YOU know this. If you are NOT willing to leave...then I guess your ONLY option is to stay and do whatever SHE feels is right...what other option do you have? Where is YOUR family? Maybe you could stay with them? Does your BF have a Dad? Other family? Have you checked with Social Services or Family Shelters? Good Luck!