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While were you out waiting in line for black ops, i spent 2 hours looking up poems and love letters. Writing till my hand cramped up and couldn't write anymore expressing my love for you hoping that you would start showing more affection towards me since the only time we kiss is when i leave for work in the morning or when you go to your pool tournaments. I barely got a thank you out of you even though you said you like them. i figured i would make it a game to be playful since yesterday i was in a very good mood. then you asked how many i had more hidden and the way you said it seemed like you wasn't even interested in finding them. then all day today you knew i wasn't feeling right and yet you played your new game while our daughter ran free throughout the house and i had to more or less watch her. you knew i didn't feel good so why every time i tried speaking you interrupted me or picked a fight with me? i feel so unloved and useless as your wife and sometimes i wonder why i married you. you disrespect me yet i stay because i married you for a reason and i know marriage takes work and i wanted to be with you till death to us part like i promised in our vows. despite feeling like your maid while you play your xbox, i try to keep you happy because i am your wife. why can't you take time out of your game time to show me love and appreciation? i don't know how much more i can take Dustin before i crack and say fuck it to everything and leave you. I'm tired of having a broken heart and feeling sad all the time. i am 18 weeks pregnant and our daughter is 2 1/2, can't you massage my feet or back without me begging you and barely receive it in the first place? Why can't you see what you really have before we walk out of your life instead of taking it for granted? marriage isn't supposed to be like this. I don't have the strength nor the courage to take my own life because the thought of leaving my daughter would forever haunt me. you know im depressed yet you haven't even tried to comfort me. i hope and pray everyday that things will change and you would show me that loving husband i remember on our wedding day and when i told you i was pregnant. where did you go?

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xavie...
Nov. 9, 2010 at 7:12 PM

i know how you feel. my fiance used to not appreciate anything i did. he had an xbox and used to play it all the time. he sold it but now he's going to be getting a playstation. i usually watch our son while he plays his games. i did leave once for a month and went to my dad's. he has changed a lot since then. i don't expect him to change over night. i talked to him about how i felt ignored and unloved. now he spends more time with me and our son. have you ever tried talking to him about how you feel? i know it hurts when you feel unloved. i've cried a lot over feeling that way. i had to leave to make him realize what he had. i'm not suggesting you leave but i hope everything works out for the best. *hugs*

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lsnyd...
Nov. 9, 2010 at 9:41 PM

i did talk to him about it and he seemed like he cared but now it seems like he doesn't even care sometimes about my feelings. i crave attention and affection on a daily basis and i have been tempted where i wanted to bust his xbox into pieces.

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Sange...
Nov. 10, 2010 at 2:27 AM

i know how you feel..i am 15 weeks pregnant now, and our son is 2. when my son was born, my then fiance did not do anything except computer and xbox, and go to work. i was a sahm. it was terrible, he was so selfish. he wouldn't even let me go shower, i just had to take care of him and the baby nonstop. i did not feel loved. (he even yelled at me for not taking out the trash, he should have been doing it! we lived on the 4th floor and i had a new baby, and my body was not freaking healed yet, plus i had two finals coming up. anyways.... i've always just hung in there because i was an only child and i want my children to have a father.. i love him my husband, but i know that he is a very selfish person. i finally at least got the showers after his mom talked to him, and we went to one therapy session....

 

nowadays... i know that i am hormonal.....and i am getting depressed again, because of the pregnancy, because of being home alone caring for my son, (no car now since he needs it for work) because of the extreme lack of affection when he comes home... (but that is now because he works longer hours and just has time for sleep and eating dinner, and shower wen he gets back..) and i have thought to myself..... you can't make someone love you, you can't make someone appreciate you. and it's kind of like an epiphany for me... because i've decided to love myself and take care of myself better (he would come home.. i would ask for hugs.. and i wouldn't get any....) so i guess i am in the same boat as you... but he has already broken my heart and now... i just drag myself along.., not a very uplifting message im sorry :( if you want to talk, just message me. we're in the same boat =\

 

*sigh* just tell him flat out and demand more affection and attention. and that you are pregnant and emotional and need extra loving.... and demand it! i know.... sometimes we women expect them to read minds... but sometimes, telling them flat out or having someone else tell them might be the trick.... haha i would start sending him articles on how women are tired and their whole body hurts.. emotions are out of whack cause of hormones, and how we need comfort and love, and they need to be there for us.

 

good luck to you.. i feel for you.

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xavie...
Nov. 10, 2010 at 10:44 AM

i know how you feel about smashing the xbox. i wish i could give you better advice. maybe you could tell him to have a set day of the week or time of day just for you two to spend together. if that doesn't work i suggest counseling. 

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lsnyd...
Nov. 11, 2010 at 2:14 PM

here's the funny thing about my husband. he doesn't work cause there are no jobs around here and he gets unemployment. i work everyday and basically even though i work, im expected to clean and make dinner every night. he gets mad if i don't clean for a day or two but its ok for him to stay home and watch our daughter and do nothing else but play his games. i have told him that i need to feel loved by him because i have issues with myself and always think im not pretty enough for him to show me affection. that didn't do anything. he knows me being pregnant can make me hormonal and have mood swings but im not allowed to have them around him. but its ok if he gets shitty with me. i don't understand him. he always thinks he is right in every single way or another and acts like he doesn't do anything wrong.

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