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i have come along way from my last journal post in dealing with family life and the loss of my son ive wrapped my self in my family and me and dh have started to ttc baby #3 which makes me happy but sometimes i find myself falling back to that deep dark place where i mourn the loss of anthony in silence when i see his ultrasound pictures and hold his things it hurts so much know he will never use them i am only human and i understand trusting and putting my faith in god and his reasonings behind what happened but i also slip and let myself become human and selfish asking the why o why questions i go to the doctor on mon and i plan on speaking to my doctor about my situation and if i am healthy enough to carry another baby as well as speak to him about a new dr maybe a specilist in high risk pregnancys to help me make it to term i am hopeful and positive and have been praying that the news i get will be good i need this so bad i can feel it through my whole body i will never forget the child that i loss but having a beautiful healthy baby to share me dh and ds life with would be wonderful untill next time all good things : )

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MyGiR...
Nov. 19, 2010 at 2:25 AM

ALWAYS LUV AND MISS YA GIRLIE, I SUR DO HOPE U GET THAT BABY AND CARRY HIM/HER TO FULL TERM AND THAT THE LORD BLESSES U IN MANY MANY WAYS .. GOOD THINGS COME TO THOSE WHO WAIT .. KEEP UR HEA UP AND CONTINUE SMILING ANTHONY IS WATCHING OVER U EVRYDAY AND IS IN UR HEART FOREVER

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