So I am trying to get through my first Xmas without my dad (my best friend) and now my mother has a few weeks to live and probably won't see Xmas, and I am financial tapped to top things off (no pressure right?).

I understand that life has it's obstacles but come on...let me come up for air!!

My relationship is so on edge right now I feel like I am in a prize fight in the 10th round and I just won't go down...but I am exhausted! I need a day to recharge, but that isn't in my cards right now.

 I asked the kids if we could start decorating for Christmas today( I was looking for a distraction) and I got.."but it isn't even Thanksgiving yet"...oh my..and Thanksgiving we always had my parents over and to sit at the table and with just us, it is already tearing me apart. I know..just keep breathing right!!

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