I went to bed last night around... early? The kids weren't sleeping yet, but they were in bed, and on the way to sleeping, and with the monitor I don't feel bad about letting them talk till 1:00 am if they feel like it as long as there aren't any big crashes I figure we're alright.

Anyway, I was in bed, but not asleep, and this happened...

DH: *cheesy grin* Wanna do me a favor?

Me: *sigh* What do you want?

DH: I need cigarettes.

Me: I'm already in bed!

DH: So?!

Me: Aren't you leaving for work soon?

DH: Yeah, in a little while!

Me: Okay, then I guess you can have cigarettes in a little while, I'm IN BED!

DH: *pouts* Fine! Don't go! I dunno why you ALWAYS have to make such a big deal out of everything! It's just a quick trip down the road! *pouts some more*

Me: *Hrmph!*

10 minutes, and a pissed off text to a CM friend later

DH: Well?! Are you going?! I need Dr pepper too.

Me: Um, no I'm not going, you just said fine don't go!

DH: *pouts* C'mon! Can't you just do this for me! What is the big deal! You're just sitting there!

Me: (laying on my left side under the covers without my glasses on in hopes of the braxton hicks subsiding) WTF?! Fine!

DH:No! Don't fucking go!

Me: Fine! I won't.

Another 10 minutes and several angry texts to multiple CM friends later

DH: Well? Did you go?

Me: What the fucking shit?! Are you serious!

DH: YES!

Me: You're about to go to work, and I'm already in bed, AND you got a friggin hand job today! Go get your own fucking cigarettes!

DH: *nagnagnagnagnagnagnag*

Me: FINE! I'm going! Just STFU!

*Bank card is declined.... 4 times. Convenience store guy says "It's no big deal! Take your stuff, and come back tomorrow, you can pay for it then"*

Me: *walk in the room to find DH still playing his xbox* DH..... is there money in the bank acct to cover your cigarettes and soda?

DH: No. *back to lol'ing at his friends on the game*

Me: Then why the fuck did you send me to the store to buy you shit with NO MONEY?

DH: *HRMPH!* Here! There's my paypal card AND $60 in cash! *Throws cash on the floor in front of me* But you already have the stuff, so STFU and stop bugging me!

Me: Um, WTF sense does it make to send me to the store with NO MONEY! You had the PP card AND cash and you let me go try to buy you shit with NO MONEY?

DH: So!

Me: Now, not only have I been publicly humiliated, but I get to go BACK and pay this guy now!

DH: WHY!

Me:Um, BECAUSE I DIDN'T HAVE ANY MONEY!!!!

DH: *ignores me*

*Back at the store*

Store Guy: What are you doing here?! You didn't have to come back out tonight, I trust you! You're like Sarah Palin/Tina Fey! You look just like Tina Fey *lol*

Me: No, I owed you for that stuff and I wanna get it taken care of! No big deal.

Store Guy: Ahhh! You're a good person Tina Fey!

*Back at home*

DH: Where'd you go?

Me: *facepalm*

 

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Comments:

Shayl...
Nov. 23, 2010 at 2:12 PM

Umm first of all I didn't get an angry text and second Josh is going to make me make you join polygamy with Chris

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AmaliaD
Nov. 23, 2010 at 2:35 PM

dude!!  what the fuck (sorry had to really spell it out here)  1. your preggo   2. you are in bed   3.  and he expects you to do stuff for him - let alone he let you go w/o money... oh dude... that man would be sorry if he messed with me like that.   seems like a complete dick in that story!  

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Mommy...
Nov. 23, 2010 at 2:37 PM

He isn't the worst. But he has his moments. He also has NO understanding of "I'm pregnant, you made me this way, now GET OUT OF MY FACE!"

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Storm...
Nov. 25, 2010 at 8:11 PM

I keep trying to like this douche but that horse died two years ago and I'm done beating it.

But you really DO look like Sarah Palin/Tina Fey.  Plus, they're both hawt.

PS, this looks like Lisa's color, huh?

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