Why does there have to be such a thing as pain?

[preciouschild]

  My sister and I were both born with psuedo tumors in the back of our heads. A pseduo tumor is a fake tumor. In the back of our heads we have a condition that our spinal fluid builds up and makes a psudeo tumor. When it fills up it can have a lot of different bad things happen. With my sister she had terrible headaches. She is the reason we found out that we both had this issue. She had to have a shunt put in to drain her fluid from the back of her head to her stomach. Well it malfunctioned 2x and killed her because her heart couldn't handle all the stress and pain.

   This brings me to my health issues. For the last 4 years I have tried to deal with the pain that my psuedo tumor has caused. Because of the tumor my head has pressed on my facial nerves and destroyed them. This has made my left side of my face hurt  so bad.I have been seeing a pain dr for the pain but today he tells me theres nothing else he can do I have to see a neuro surgeon now to see what he can do. This scares me so much that no one in real life can understand. Tara saw the neuro surgeon and did what they wanted her to do and now my heart aches for my sister. I so wish she was here because she would know what I was going through. I don't want to die. I have a beauitful daughter . I want to work some day and not be disabled any more.But if my surgery fails like Tara's did how would John take care of Nikki all by himself? He's a great dad but there's times when he wants time to himself or when he's frustrated and his temper can be short.