jan 23

[harry]

english muffin for brkfst this morn w/ coffee, then should have gone for walk or something but stayed in , too dang cold, in the single digets this morn , was not about to go out into that so took a fluid pill and stayed in . Did some work around the house , sent Fred to store for more chicken as we are having chicken parmesan for supper , never made it before and have to start learning to use low fat stuff , either that or very little of the real stuff on my portions . Electric went out this after noon putting part of the house in darkness , not bad though went out around 3 pm and came back on in full around 4:30 or so .

So had 11/2c spa ( should be 1c i know but missed snack period ) 1c veggies , 1 chicken breast ( only ate 1/2 , saved the rest for ontop of salad tomorrow for lunch ) and i am very proud of myself , i had mandrin orange sections for dessert instead of the choc marble cake we,ve all been trying to get rid of . Going to have to start making smaller cakes so they disappear quicker and not be around so much . Wish i had Ralph ,s metabolism, man can eat anything and still weigh 150 lbs !!!! But he moves around alot and me im pretty well confined. If i go out in this freezing cold , my lungs suffer and my chest hurts so i am a bit limited , spring will be better i know . If i worked inside a place and walked around alot then i know id be better off but until then here i am .

I got to thinking that when i worked at Salvo , i got to walk around all day as you were not suppose to stand in one ;place too long , pushing a brickey cart loaded to the gills ( cause they didnt like me ) was actually quite the work out , should have stayed but I wont stay where im not wanted and that just about everywhere so i go off on my own to make $ . People wonder why i dont play well w/ others , if someone is nice to me i am nice to them but before too long they change their mind about me for some reason ( everyone makes sure i dont find out why ) and then they dont want me around any more so , fine ive come to love my solitude . I need to have a job where im pretty much all by myself , in my own little corner of the world, give me a list of things to do and leave me alone and ill be happy . I know how to ask for help when i need it and give it when it is asked of me . I hate people who act like they like me when i know they really dont .

So tomorrow going to go to laundry matt hopefully w/ soni and do wash , get that done , get back home , go over to clean a house i work for and then home to be by myself w/ the dog , hopefully can do some dancing , get that in . I want to but the vibes have to be just right . Thought about getting out line dancing sheets and finding some of the songs we used to dance to and trying those, wish floor in house was more secure , dont like the idea of landing in the cellar .

Thurs weather is suppose to warm up, hope it does , might get out after work and walk around the block or something . At least be doing something w/ myself . People talk about walking so many miles a day , im good for about 1 mile,. maybe 2 and that,s about it , then the heel starts hurting and such and im ready for home and my slippers .

well will write again tomorrow and let you know how day went, Elaine