I need help and advice.

[Kim370]

My mom is going through the first stages of dementia.   I think it has gotten a lot worse but my dad disagrees.  I am not sure how to handle it because she can be very mean.  She has been mean to my kids for no reason and I have to explain to the kids about her condition.  However, sometimes I think she does know what she is saying.  I dont know, maybe, she has no idea.   She "dreams" up scenarios that have never happened.  For example, she thought I had a b-day party at my house and didnt invite her.  I never did, and I am not sure where she got the idea from.  So, my daughter went to see her, and she yelled at my daughter about not inviting her.  I do not know how to react to some of the things she says or does.  She was mad at me on my birthday and never said, Happy Birthday but she was very aware that it was my birthday.  She questions everything that I do, and she yells at my dad about the littleist things.  If anyone has gone through this, or knows more about the conditions of dementia, please give me advice.

[kkbird]

Jan. 25, 2011 at 8:45 PM

its EXTREMELTY HARD to watch your loved one go through this.  you can take with the dr's about some meds to mellow her, but that is only masking the problem.  I would say still chat with Dr to see some options. maybe check out some groups also.  But I here if you need a shoulder. And always walk away in anger rather than lashing back out at her.... just tell her you love her.  It's so unfair and breaks your heart ... take care

[roseisrose]

Jan. 26, 2011 at 1:03 PM

I wish I had some brilliant advice to help ease your mind and heart right now. All I know is that I would asking a professional to help understand what should be done for her and what you can do to help yourselves out -- get some answers, I bet that would make you feel a lot better. Talk to someone -her Dr or something to find out what you should be doing to make it easier on her and all of you.

[uniquemom30]

Apr. 23, 2011 at 9:33 AM

My father inlaw is going through this and it's been extremely hard on him. His mother has Dementia and she is very mean with him. It's so sad, when we go visit her in the summer. We have to go right along with her, when she saids things that are no true or doesn't remember who we are. She thought My husband and son were brothers, last time we visited. She still thinks my husband is in school, like high school. She cusses at my father inlaw on the phone a lot.:-(