No doubt about it - I am obese.  Let's be blunt - I'm fat.  I am 5'5" and weight 255 pounds, give or take a pound.  I thought long and hard about having surgery before I went and got my Lap Band.  Really, I did.

It chaps my ass that some people are questioning my decision.  I'm a big girl - literally and figuratively.  I know what I need, thanks.  No back-seat drivers on my health, damn it! 

And for the love of cheeses, please don't give me the freakin' diet, exercise, and 'will power' pep talk.  I've been there and done that!  I've been to Weigh Watcher and had yo-yo success.  I've been to a dietician and nutricianist and tried their plans.  I've tried the gym, the weight loss gimicks and the goofy diets.  Here's the problem - I like to eat.  Will power is a nice idea, but when you have stomach the size of a football and you are told to eat the size of a tennis ball, guess what?  You're gonna feel hungry!  If I had any will power, do you think I would ever have gotten this big??  

Oh, and don't tell me about the next surgeries I'll need to have.  Like I said, I've done the research.  I know my skin may sag, I may have 'over hang' on my belly, my boobs will shrink and droop, and other such issues.  I really don't need to hear about the people you know and the rashes, infections and how 'ugly' they felt after the weight loss.  I'm well aware of all of these things and I'm pretty sure I won't feel any uglier than I do at this weight.  I'll tackle those issues as they come.

I have a huge love of life.  I did this for me, for my kids, for my husband, and for a long healthy life with them.  I love travel, I love adventure, and I love trying new things and meeting new people.  Losing the weight will enable me to accomplish more of my dreams and add years to my life.  And it will be nice to be able to buy clothes that don't have an X after the number!  I am positive that this was the right choice for me and I have the complete support of my family and dearest friends. 

If you don't have anything positive to say, then please don't say anything at all. 

And if you choose to say something negative anyway, then please don't be offended when I tell you to kiss my shrinking ass.  I'm just kind of a bitch, no matter what my size.

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Comments:

luvnm...
Mar. 20, 2011 at 11:11 PM

First of all... congrats to you.. I have been big all my life so I totally understand what you are saying . I hope things go well for you . Its your life and it seems that you have made very good thoughtful decisions. I applaud you!!! Blessings!

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mysti...
Mar. 21, 2011 at 12:28 AM

Hugs Johnnie.  I guess those who aren't your fans haven't followed Today Show Weather man,  Al Roker.  He also had the ups and downs of weight issues.  Tried everything,  nothing worked.  His is a success story of Lap band and look at him today.  I wish you only happiness and shrinkage for you.  You go girl!!!!  It's your life,  live it your way.  But do keep us posted so we too may share your happiness along the way...:)

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catha...
Mar. 21, 2011 at 2:09 AM

woooo!! you go! I'm excited you found something that'll work for you!

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SelaC...
Mar. 21, 2011 at 8:30 AM

I know a girl who weighed a lot more than you who finally got a gastric bypass. It was rough going and the follow up surgeries to remove excess skin were really hard on her. But she looks amazing now and I'm so proud of her for doing what she had to do to get healthy! You go, girl!

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heart...
Apr. 9, 2011 at 3:51 PM

WTG..Good luck..wishing you much success..:)

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25bee...
May. 9, 2012 at 1:43 PM

You are X tremely courageous!

 one of my dearest friends did the lap band. 6 months later, she was shocked to look at old photos and realize she does not resemble the 'fridge any longer. She is happy with the results.

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