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This gorgeous blue eye boy is my wonderful son. He was born 3 weeks early by c-section. I had pre-eclampsia and both our heart rates dropped many times before the decision was made to get him out. He was born May 26th 2003 at 5:15pm.  he was 8lbs 8oz, and 21 inches long.  He was my special miracle, I was not supposed to have kids, and I nearly lost him durring the pregnancy. 

All his life I always thought he was a little funny. He was not breast fed because he was unable to suckle, he couldn't suck until he was three years old.  He also wasn't able to talk well until he was around 3. We thought it was his ears, but recently we are starting to re-evaluate that idea.
He never really liked to cuddle, kiss, hug and most of the time would not even say I love you.
He never really liked being around kids, never tried to be friends with any kids, in fact he would try and stay away from other kids.

He has/had obsessions with odd objects. cell phones, flash lights, straws, all kinds of odd things.  He doesn't like to wear underwear, will take his shirt off whenever he can, has to always touch the wall when walking by it.
Loud noises have always bothered him, again we thought it was his ear issues but now we have another idea.

When I would drop him off at daycare he would literally scream for hours, he couldn't cope with the chaos and amount of people that were there. I never really thought anything of it, again until recently.
My mom had suggested him being autistic because he has always been different, always had an odd way of behaving. but I always brushed it off because she was the only one who brought it up. I figured no one else is saying anything so it cant be what she thinks it is, its just how he is.

In Kindergarten his teacher was concerned, the school psycologist was concerned. He would pretend he was someone else, he would become a super hero or someone else, pretty much to cope with the chaos and discomfort he felt. They felt he had a few issues then, but NO ONE told me to get him evaluated, so I never thought anything of it.  Figured he is a kid, he likes super heros nothing more to it.
First grade, again, super heros.  Odd obsessions, not making friends, not being able to handle much change at all, and acting out whenever any change would occur.  Again, teacher felt something might e going on but never said anything.

This year he is in 2nd grade, this year my mom brought up her thoughts more often, asking me "are you sure he isn't just alittle autistic? are you sure because he has a lot of the traits autistic children do".  Again I pushed it out of my mind, saying no one else is saying that so obviously nothing is going on with him.
then comes the first parent teacher meeting.  She tells me how he has a hard time finding the words to tell people things.  Tells me how he doesn't make friends, tells me he does make eye contact, tells me how he is afraid to talk to anyone or approach anyone, tells me he seems developmentally slow in some areas....I say "my mom thinks he might be autistic". 
The teacher looks me in the eye and says "I am so glad you brought that up because I thought the same thing I just wasn't sure how to tell you what I felt.".
That day things changed for me, for our family. I thought back to all the things he had done, all the behaviors he exhibited, every little thing from the day he was born to now. I did research, I talked to people. 
From every single thing i have read, heard, seen I have come to the conclusion that my son is autistic, or at least on the spectrum of aspergers.  We started the process with the teacher at my sons shool and the school psycologist. It was slow going.  Then the teacher called and asked that I also go the pediatrician and get a referall. 
I go there, and she also sees what everyone else sees. He most likely has Apsergers, and a learning disability. 
At first my husband was against the idea completely, NO there was no way our son has that, there is nothing wrong with him...Then we start doing research, start hearing more about it. Start going about the process of getting him  evaluated. And now my husband is accepting of it. he also works with someone who has aspergers, and I think that helped to get him to realize what apsergers really is.
WRONG, thats the first thing people think when they hear autism...Nothing is WRONG with that child.  Guess what NOTHING IS WRONG with the child.  Austism/Aspergers is not wrong.  In fact my son is perfect, smart, sweet, loving, handsome.  He has his days, he has his moments.  But there is NOTHING wrong with him.

We are 4 to 6 months away from even getting our first appointment to be evaluated. Its frustrating because the only help I can get right now comes from other parents with children with autism and aspergers. parents who have been through all of this, parents who know what I am talking about when I say something.
When I have a problem with my son, or a question I go to a group here on CafeMom. The Austism/Aspergers PDD Awareness group, one of the only groups I know I can go on and not get flak for posting or just venting. The first place I go to when I need answers or just support.

April is Autism Awareness Month, and I am here to share my story and say that I am proud of my child. We have a long way to go to get to where we need to be to get the support and help from doctors and others, but we will get there and until then I know there is a group of moms who are willing to help me out.
Happy AAM!!!

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Comments:

qwiet...
Apr. 5, 2011 at 10:36 AM

Look at those beautiful blue eyes! Thank you for sharing your story  :o)

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justt...
Apr. 5, 2011 at 12:12 PM

Your son is adorable! Beautiful blue eyes. Thank you for sharing your story.

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Vinta...
Apr. 5, 2011 at 2:04 PM

He is adorable! My husband has Aspergers. They see the world differently than we do, thats for sure.

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Vinta...
Apr. 5, 2011 at 2:06 PM

I understand what you mean about not wanting to hear something is "wrong." I went through the same thing with my oldest (he is in second grade too) and the teacher was like 'he needs to be seen. i know you don't want to, but he isn't going to be able to do his work until you get him help.'

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evwsq...
Apr. 5, 2011 at 5:02 PM

I'm so glad that CafeMom has a place that you can go to get support!

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missa...
Apr. 6, 2011 at 1:05 AM

i have a cousin and she has 2 girls.  The 3 yr old has autism and the 1 yr old has aspergers and jus like your story when the 3 yr old was starting to walk etc we noticed something was different.  she didnt talk and didnt want to be bothered with others.  Reading your story and seeing that there are adults with asperger's who works and the comment from the mom thats married to a man with it as well lets me know that she can have a normal life. Our family didnt know much abt either...the autism or the aspergers.  since she's been diagnosed this is my first time ever hearing of it.

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tabit...
Apr. 16, 2011 at 11:41 PM

He is so cute!

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