Hmmm not really sure what to think.

To start at the beginning .. I only met my brothers about 8 years ago. I didnt know them before. I went to visit and we got to know each other a little bit.. but not really a close relationship.. we all have different views on the biological father.  Well I have tried the my space thing and it didnt work.. so then phone calls .. none returned.. then facebook.. no answers to the friends requests. Well I happened on the page of an old friend of mine .. and there is my step mom! Wow .. I didnt even know she had a face book page! Then I look at hers and there are my brothers ... even the girl friends!! But my requests have gone un-answered. 

See I have tried to have a relationship with my bio dad and he wants no part of it. He has lots to do with his other kid and step kids and all their kids but not me or mine. I dont feel that its my responsibility to keep on and on and on begging for some sort of relationship... so I guess this just hurts my feelings to see that they are all buddied up and dont even speak to me anymore.. but thats ok ..I have a loving family at home!! Thanks for listening to me grunt!!

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Apr. 22, 2011 at 7:34 AM

I understand how you feel, my bio father was introduced to me when I was like 13 or so,I spoke with him over the years maybe a hand full of times. He has a daughter that I met during school, a long time ago. He has nothing to do with me and my sister, and plenty to do with his daughter and her kids. I was making the effort there for a while, not him so, I said Hell with it, that's not right. I fired out a letter to him , telling him what I thought of him and how I didn't understand how me and my sister were so unimportant. His response in a cheap card was "God has forgiven me for my mistakes and sorry you feel that way!" That was all that was said after I poured my guts out in a 4 page letter!I feel for you in this situation, my advise would be to write how your feeling in the form of a letter, you may wanna send it and then again, you may not, but getting it off your chest does help. Do you stand to lose much if your were to send it? Over time it does get a little easier and like you said, you at least have your own family which does help ease the pain. Also, try to remember this, you cant change who they are and how they choose to live their lives, but you can work on you and hopefully soon these feelings you have will lessen over time. Tell yourself this like me and my sister do, "IT'S THEIR LOSS!" Chin up Mama!

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Apr. 23, 2011 at 12:12 AM

Well while I am not glad that we are going through this .. I am glad I am not alone .. Not that I thought I was .. No I stand nothing to lose but my time lol.. that is it.. I have went to a lawyer telling them that I would like my step father to adopt me .. yep... even at my age  and they told me that I would still have to have my bio fathers permission!! You have got to be kidding me.. Why not just ask my husband cause I have his name now lol... but sure enough they said I would have to have his permission. I think this is crazy !!

I really do appreciate all the advise ...I will be writing.. more than likely wont take the time to send it to him but I do think that it would feel better to get it off my chest !! Many blessings to you!!

Anonymous (Original Poster)

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