i am really trying to come to terms with my life. i am not happy. i am not a good mother. i am lazy. i am dirty... but i want to change.

i want to start of with why i know i am a bad mother.

1. i am very inconsitant

2. i am very moody and my actions reflect how i am feeling

3. i dont cook healthy meals for my kids and blame it on having no time and because they eat healthy at school        (im a single mother of two kids under 5, go to school 15 credits, and work)

4. i dont brush my children's teeth most nights only when we all feel up to it

5. my house is trashed... like my kitchen floor has become an extra garbage can (there is a baby gate up so the     kids cant get into it but still) and still garbage and papers all over the floor

6. while i love my kids i cant stand it when my oldest talks and talks about nothing so i tune him out responding      with answers like wow thats so cool. how did that make you feel/think/act...

7. i dont brush my own teeth (lead by example right?)

8. i dont shower daily (or even every other day - sometimes not even for a week or two)

9. i just dont take care of me or the kids...

i make sure their basic needs are met (clean, clothed, and fed) but other than that... i dont know. there are other reasons i feel like a bad mother but i cant think right now. im so tired im falling asleep...

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Apr. 30, 2011 at 3:28 AM

You poor, poor woman.  You sound like you can use professional help.  Do you have a minister, counselor at your children's school or loved one you can turn to.  Please call someone as soon as you can because I am afraid for you and your children.  I love you and God loves you.  Please make the call for help soon.

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Apr. 30, 2011 at 7:55 AM

I'm sorry you are dealing with this...I really think you do need to speak with your Doc or a Counselor...it sounds like you have some depression going on. It's so great that you want to change and that you recognize the things you need to change!! That's a huge step in the right direction! I hope you'll check into some counseling or ask your Doc about it. GOOD LUCK!!

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Apr. 30, 2011 at 8:35 AM

 Reach out for help.  Talk to your doctor.  It does seem like you have depression going on.  Only you can make a change and a difference in your life.  The good thing is you realize and want this all to change.  Start a new day, and set goals not only for yourself but for your children.  Plan one day to clean although it may seem overwhelming then just take a few hours, take a break and then go back and clean some more.  Slowly but surely things will get cleaned up.  It is so important to set an example for your children.  Try and make up a schedule each day from the kids brushing their teeth to showering.  Setting goals and completing them will make you feel better.  You need to feel better about yourself and that starts from within.  Take some time for yourself.  You deserve to feel better.  Children need more then their basic needs met, make them feel special spend some quality time with them plan a trip to the playground, play board games show them all the love they need.  If you need a friend or someone just to listen you can message me.  I hope things will get better.  Continue to reach out and get the help you need.

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Apr. 30, 2011 at 9:17 AM

A bad mother wouldn't have put that out there in hopes of turning things around.

It does sound like you need help. When I get that way, I do too. You have a LOT on your plate, and it's easy to get overwhelmed. The not taking care of your teeth/showering is a big red flag for me that you are not feeling good-- and the tired, overwhelming and moody feeling is also.

PPs have good advice. Your doctor, a pastor or social services/school will be able to point you towards some resources to help you. It may not take much time either, sometimes these are totally free. Please ask. I think you will find that most of your issues are signs of a sickness that can be medicated and controlled, giving you extra energy and happiness. In the meanwhile, getting out for a walk or exercise daily can help a little, but there is no substitute for professional help at this point.

You and your kids will get through this together. They can help, too. If they clean their stuff and have chores, that's good for both of you. Seeing you fix things and take care of yourself is the best example you can give them to help keep this from happening to them when they are older (it happens a LOT, we give them examples of what is normal)

Take care!


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Jul. 11, 2011 at 9:17 AM

Tracy what the hell you saying? No what she needs is CPS in her life to take those babies and put the mother in Jail so she can shower everyday and do hard work and think about what she has done. Those babies will be well cared for.

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