sometimes I feel

[timsmom507]

I am a first time mom and sometimes I feel like a horrible mom and person. My son is two and is very active. His doctor thinks he may have ADHD but he's too young to be dianosised for sure. He doesn't sit still or walk by my side. He doesn't listen or do what's he is told. I see other people's kids and they are so well behaved. My kid embarrasses me in public and at family parties. I was told not to bring him to my aunt's house.

Growing up everyone said I would be a good mother. My mom yelled but never hit us. She seemed to have a calm demeaner. She died 12 yrs ago. I don't have the help from my mom. I think I would be happier if I could have a part time job and mom could baby sit. I am home alone all the time with only my son. We are a 1 car family which my husband takes to work. I park is over 2 miles away. I live in an apt so we cant' make too much noise. I get so frustrated. I just want to run away sometimes. I am not happy as a mom. I have my moments of happiness but it's only moments. I don't have the patentice to handle this child. He is very smart for a 2 yr old, knows colors, shapes, can count to 30 in English ,10 in Spanish, alphabets.

Like just now he throw a football at my face! It hurt. He is only 2 but god damnit! I need to get the hell away from this. I need a day off without him. I need time for myself. I hate when strangers tell me "good luck". I have so many medical appointments with different doctors and sometimes he has to come with me. I feel if those dr's cant' handle my kid in the room then I should look for a new dr. I think I have all these problems from stress. I don't do anything to relax. There is nothing to do. I don't drink. I don't have a hobby. I feel as if I dont' have friends anymore either. My BFF as a new friend she hangs out with all the time. She never calls me. I try calling her and she doesn't call me back. I have another friend who has kids the same age but they are more brats than my son. They don't listen at all nor do they play nice. They always hit my son. I dont' want to teach him to fight but I wish he would push them back. I feel trapped. I wish for so much.

[Kellyjude1]

May. 3, 2011 at 8:47 PM

  It sounds like you really just need a break.  I am sorry for how you are feeling.  At 2 years old children are extremely active.  It would help if you could get him out of the apartment maybe go for a walk.  Is there a place where you can go outside to play ball, or just for him to release some of his energy?  Is he on a schedule?  Sometimes having a schedule helps.  Try and plan different activities to do everyday.  Do you have any help or support possibly someone who can babysit so that you can get a break?  Just taking some time for yourself may help.  If you need a friend or someone just to listen you can message me.  I hope things get better.