I can't seem to keep myself happy these days. And I know that no one else can. It's tough being stuck in the house everyday. I have no job, no education, no skills. No passion, even. I used to be a bubbly ambitious girl and I feel like I don't even know who I am some days. My 5yo will be starting kindergarten in the fall and I would really REALLY like to find a job and put the 1yo in daycare. I need a life outside of these walls. I need something to conversate about besides the kids to my hubby. I need someone other than hubby to talk to. I need my own money. If I find a job, if there's money that does't immediately need to be put toward bills, I can start saving. I can save and go to school. I'm thinking about medical assiting. I can see myself doing that. I think it would be fulfilling. That's what I've been missing: a sense of accomplishment. I thought I'd be doing better by 25, but at least I'm starting to get an idea of where I could go.

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Mento...
Jun. 9, 2011 at 6:57 PM

I have definitely been there and understand your frustration. I was lucky enough to belong to La Leche League, a great group of mentor moms. And over the years I met other women, many with college degrees, who had made child rearing a career choice instead of going out in the work world. They knew these years don't last forever and didn't want to miss them. So instead of just doing the basics, I decided to give mothering my best.

I decided to be in charge of my years at home, and figured I would still have time to be away from my kids when they were in school.  I became self-educated in nutrition and learned about whole foods cooking and how to have healthier kids. (I loved every book by Adelle Davis, including Let's Have Healthy Childen.) I got homecraft ideas and made simple decorations for the house.

It didn't cost much to start sewing for the kids and myself. I also gardened. The kids played in the dirt and I raised vegetables. There is always something to learn. You can read about Montessori in the home to create a wonderful preschool environment.  Volunteering is fun, too, like taking the kids to a nursing home to visit the elderly. We were also regulars at the public library, where I met other stay-at-home moms. Just because a woman doesn't have a college degree doesn't mean she can't be well-educated.

A book called How to Raise a Brighter Child by Joan Beck taught me that I had plenty to do if I only thought about it. I could be preparing my child to be successful in ways I never realized.

My friend has a job on Sunday mornings in a church nursery. They pay well and she can take her kids. That might be an idea.

In the work world you are one thing to everybody. With children you are everything to just a few. Money might be tight, but consider that you are the best caregiver for your children. No one loves them, gives them more attention, loves and kisses than you do. When you give your best to raising your kids, you are putting gold in the bank.

Please visit my website for more parenting encouragement and insights for stay-at-home moms: http://www.familyfieldguide/.

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