Another 'not in that group' one...
You may already be doing family dinners, which is great, but do you avoid talking about certain things at the table because the kids are there? Of course, in some cases, you may have to, but otherwise, why not ask them for their opinions?
They're part of the family, too, and you might be surprised by their answers. Plus, encouraging them to express their thoughts and ideas will make them feel more important, valued, and loved, which helps build good self-esteem.
Do you involve your kids in family decisions? Which ones?
Gave the final word to? Never.
When we decided to sell and move (for a lot of reasons) they were initially extremely resistant. We listened to their explanations, accompanied them in their frustrations and fears... and moved anyhow.
There were never things we didn't talk about around the kids, apart from the details of our sex life, I think.
They always knew what kinds of things we were thinking about, what kinds of issues we were handling. And, they often had excellent ideas about what to do, or new ways to think about old problems.