Inside my Heart Right Now

[tonys_sunrise]

Today has been full of challenges both big and small. Drew of course is running around yelling like a banshie. What gives? I mean I am having soooo many problems with him lately and don't know what to do. The doctors say its not ADD, ADHD, or autisim. He has been tested for em all. So whats wrong? Lack of dicipline? No he gets punnished on a regular basis. And I do mean regular. Like every 10 seconds. He refuses to listen and do what he is supposed to. Jayden my 2 year old is mimiking his older brother. He does mind a little better though. I am just holding on to my ropes end. You know that little string that always seems to be strong enough to hold you. thats where I am. I am so sick and tired of being well.... me. Tony is still bringing home pointless checks. I just have no idea what to do anymore. Its so hard to keep being the one to say "Babe it will be okay. We'll make it work we alwaays do." How can you keep telling someone something oyu aren't sure you belive yourself anymore? I am sitting here on a saturday my hubby is doing an odd job to help make up for all the time he lost this past week. I jsut don't know anymore. I don't understand how good people can have it so hard. Its not like we are just sitting on our asses. It seems though the harder we try the farther back we go. And I am so sick of my brother and sister in law living it up like they are the money tree. Yesterday my SIL was wanting me to go shopping with her. I told her I couldn't. I jsut told her we are going throuhg a rough time. Her response was well McDonalds is hiring. See she is a WAHM. She got lucky and has a medical data entry job. Makes $18 an hour. And you guessed it her kids go to daycare anyway so she doesn't have to deal with them. I offered to watch them for her to make so extra cash nope. I even tried to get her to see if she couldn't get me a job just helping her out at first with her job and then maybe later getting in the full swing of things. NOPE. people like her make me wanna scratch her eye balls out. And I'm not a violent person but she just rubs me the wrong way. It chaps my ass for her to have all these nice things and she is a horrible person. But thats the way it works most of the time. Good people are poor and they are poor because they are good. We'd rather give it away than keep it for ourselves.

I'm sorry about the ranting. It has just been building pressure for awhile.

[mammaof3girls]

May. 12, 2007 at 5:53 PM

I know life can be tough, but you gotta hang in there, at least to show all the snobs how strong you are. It will get better, this is just something you have to get through to get to the better stuff. Im sorry you have to be one of the good people that has it so rough. Stay strong, sweetie!!

Stephanie 

[penguinsrock]

May. 14, 2007 at 10:12 AM Vent away girl. You need to do that once in a while. I hear ya. The good ones always seem to have it rough. Give it time ( I know you hate hearing that) it will balance out. I am here if you need a shoulder or ear. *hugs*