VENTING

[LeAnn]

I have had the worst day with my son. He has had meltdown after meltdown. I don't know what he wants and he can't tell me which leads to frustration on both ends. He is a 3 yr. old with asperger's syndrome which is a form of autism. i've been sick and he knows that which is why i think he acts out the way he does. i hate that i let him get to me and i have to remember that he is a special needs child but sometimes i feel like i can't take it anymore. i need a break. i stay home with him. that is a 24/7/365 job and sometimes i need a break. i think i'm about to lose it. ( no i would never hurt my child.) but i need time to breathe. when u decide to have a child u think everything will be perfect. well i did. u never plan for the unexpected. i didn't know my child would be born with a neurological disorder, no one ever does. u just accept the news and deal. well i've been dealin' for 3 yrs. and i need a break. even for a night. but no one will keep him b/c they aren't able to handle him.

my son is a gift from God. i know that God would never give me more than I can handle but sometimes i wonder. u know? especially on days like today when i have been driven to tears more than once.

he's asleep now finally and i look at him and he looks like an angel sleeping. and i wonder how could i ever get so angry with him?

well i'm through venting for now.

tomorrow is another day, right?

[MontyMommy]

Jan. 22, 2007 at 10:58 PM lol...i feel you...on a different level..but i feel ya! i had one of those days today with my 3 year old! the meltdown lasted over an hour this time...that was the major one...the minor ones lead to her harming her little sister! and my wee one is healthy not special needs...but she is 3 and so is your son! its different...but the hurt we feel as moms when we can't fix whatever they are going through kills us all! hang in there and vent when you have too!
just to mention my cuz is a special needs kid and up until her 18th birthday the state provided care for her...kinda like a special needs daycare program! she spent the day with people who could care for her and help her! i don't know about where you live but maybe you can find that sort of things...or a support group with other moms like you...or start one if there isn't one! anywho what do i know!!! lol

[stephanie3]

Jan. 22, 2007 at 11:00 PM I am so sorry about your day.  I know how you feel when children have those kind of days to where nothing pleases or satisfies them.  None of  mine have special needs so I know just with working with children with disabilities in the past how you must feel.  Just think that tomorrow is a new day and God chose you to be his mother bc he knew you were  strong and loving enough to handle.  I know tomorrow will be much better

[shewith4]

Jan. 22, 2007 at 11:00 PM

LeAnn, I got chill bumps reading your venting, but I don't have special needs children.  I was blessed with healthy children (not to say I don't have days like yours). 

Aren't they such angels when they sleep??? lol. 

I know you haven't felt good, but are there activities that he reacts to?  Will he play with playdoh?  Does he color?  I hope I'm not sounding stupid because of my ignorance about asperger's syndrome.  I don't know his limitations or if he interacts at all.  What about outside play?  Any kind of distraction would help you both!! 

I will pray that you have a better day tomorrow and that you can steal some "me" time during the day!

[momofangels75]

Jan. 23, 2007 at 8:44 AM I am sorry to hear that your day went so rough yesturday.  But i know that it is nice to get alittle mommy time.  Every mom needs that.   No question about that.  I can't even say i know what that feels like to be going thru what you go thru.  I have two healthy children thank god.  But i do have the bad days also like any mom.  My oldest has ADHD and ODD.   I know that gets frustrating because when she has a bad day forget it.   Her temper goes all day and there is no reasoning with her.  Well i really hope you have a better day today.  Just breathe.  Even though that is easier said then done.

[momtocam]

Jan. 23, 2007 at 7:11 PM Tough day!!!  Hope today has been better.  When we first brought our little guy home we had some tough nights (nothing like yours-you take the cake) but I too would look at him sleeping and wonder how on earth such a precious little blessing could get me so worked up.  they truly are little angels when they sleep

[Jean1]

Feb. 23, 2007 at 6:57 PM

I hope you feel better.  Saying a little prayer might help for next time.  When I was at home everyday I used to have those days, too.  Since I have been working again I can not wait for the summer so I can be home with them again.  I think we need a balance.  Since getting a baby sitter is difficult, have you thought about maybe getting some time for yourself while your husband and your son share some father/son moments?

 

[LISSYL]

Apr. 11, 2007 at 10:25 AM

DO YOU STILL COME TO THIS GROUP I WOULD LOVE TO CHAT WITH YOU MY SON IS 10 AND IS A ASPIE I ALSO HAVE 2 WONDERFUL LITTLE GIRLS AGE  AND 7 JUST WANTED TO CHAT I COULD BECOME A FRIEND OK LISSYL

 

[hina]

May. 29, 2008 at 3:41 PM

I am so sorry you feel that way today I can understand I also have the child the same way but sometime i feel I just need to talk to someone to take the pressure out I am glad leann i found you to just talk once a week I can understand what is going on in your life

Hina

[PlayDoh]

Jan. 5, 2009 at 10:23 AM

I can totally relate to you you feel :)  I have 4 boys ages 6, 4 and 2 year old twins.  My oldest is 6 with Aspergers and Hyperlexia.  It can drain you for sure!  My husband travels full time for his job all week and when he gets home on Friday my first words are "their yours!".