second child

[jessesmom06]

how do i know when i'm ready for my second baby.? My hubby and i want another but we just cant figure when. our son well be 1 on the 23rd so should we have another now or wait till he is almost 3? i don't know what to do i really want a another child but i don't know when would be about the right time...any advice

[artisttoo]

Jul. 9, 2007 at 3:28 PM

Three years difference in children's ages seems ideal to me.  My mom had her first two three years apart and she always said that was good because the older one was out of diapers, could talk fairly well, and he was a willing helper. 

 I know how tough it can be to have several children close together.  My daughter had four children within five years.  When you have two in diapers and another two running all over the place, going to the grocery seems like a real challenge. 

If you want children closer together so that they can play together, remember they will fight together, too.  Three years apart children do play together, though the older will naturally be the leader for quite awhile.

Regardless of what I say, these are only my own opinions.  You will have to make the decision for yourself.  You know how much you can handle and what you want to deal with.  I wish you luck, no matter what you decide.

[dannersmell]

Jul. 9, 2007 at 4:04 PM i would say just when ever!! i have an 8 year old and i had my 2nd one when he was 5! that was nice to have that gap but when my 2nd was just one (like 2 days after his 1st birthday) i found out i was pregnant again! i also love having the 2 kids very close together! either way it works!! but i will say my 2 that are real close take real good care of eachother, my oldest is too old to hang aroung the little ones, he'd rather be outside with his buddies. well good luck!!

[PartyWithApril]

Jul. 10, 2007 at 8:33 PM

Ok, I have got to respond here!

None of mine were planned, it just happened, but I am so greatful it happened the way it has. Mine are 10, 5 and 1. Thing is this really depends on how much your relationship can handle. Yes, some think that oh, I want another and that's all that matters. Well, it's not all that matter! You have to take in to count the demands of 2 in your situation and think if this is really the right time. I don't care how much you love your children every relationship will face hardships when parenting. I have heard it, read it here cafemom, and lived it. So, yes I feel like and expect when it comes to this subject.

If you space your children out it allows time to be spent with the first and then when the first is a teenager and you have enjoyed the family setting of things, on occassion this teenager can watch the youngest to allow Mommy and Daddy time. Plus, every mother needs help with the little ones and again the first child can help with this. No I am not saying, that you should wait as long as I have, but I will tell you this, I am thankful that I was able to have that time with my first, then with my second and now with my third. When you begin juggling more than 1 child and the teaching, and the cleaning it becomes overwhelming. Where I sit right now, I have the time to teach each one on one and still feel that I can depend on my children's independance to survive the day. Yes, I love my chilren and I would not change a thing expect slowing down. So, this is my advice to you! Slow down and let things happen the way they are meant to. It will happen when you are both ready!

I hope I have helped and I will chat with you later!

[baybgurl417]

Aug. 10, 2007 at 6:50 PM hey lets wait a year or two and get pregnant around the same time! Hehehe....that would be so awesome!