Being a woman is a blessing, but it sure does come with its trials. My husband and I talk about this and it seems that women have so much more to deal with than men. He agrees. For some reason we are wired to create high standards for ourselves and the world. At least I am that way.


I feel pressured so often to be the best woman I can be. To make sure the house is spotless—an impossible daunting task. To make sure my husband is always taken care of and satisfied regardless of how tired I am. To make sure my parents and in-laws are happy with me. To make sure my baby is comfortable and cared for.


Not only do these pressures exist, but then there’s the emotional one’s that I can’t seem to get right. The woman is pretty much the emotional alarm in the family. When she’s happy everyone is. When she’s depressed it seems to set a damper on the entire household. That’s a lot to carry.


Then there’s the pressure of being beautiful. I’m sure every woman feels this. One thing I noticed while looking through CafeMom was that pictures of moms are viewed more than the pictures of our children. Kinda interesting. MySpace is no different. It’s basically a MYspace with pictures of our beauty proudly displayed for others to comment on. Interesting.


We face this huge desire for beauty. Magazines, television, movies, the world—they tell us beauty is one thing. God tells us beauty is another. Why, when we know that true beauty is within, do we continue seeking flawless outward beauty?


When I asked a bunch of women this question EVERY answer was this: men. We want to please our husband. Men our visual. They look at other women. Maybe not lustfully all of the time, but they notice an attractive woman. Some men do a great job at honoring their wives and not staring at other beautiful women, but most men do notice whether they want to or not.


Who knows… maybe I’m just terribly insecure, but even when I feel completely confident in myself there’s always the desire to be the most beautiful woman in the world to my husband. Impossible because there is no MOST beautiful. But oh how I want to be.


Selfish, isn’t it? Lord, help me break these selfish desires. I guess if I am focused on loving others, I won’t think so much about how “perfect” of a wife, mother, daughter, or friend I am. Perhaps if I just focus on love I can do just that… love. No standards. No desires. No needs. Just selfless love.


Wow, how impossible that sounds… but how I desire to live a life of selflessness. It’s really not about me.

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Jul. 11, 2007 at 4:20 PM

I really enjoyed this post. Selflessness is a huge portion of my spiritual path and I can totally relate to your feelings of wanting to be the best at all women are called to be.  I believe that once you focus on what you have to give to the world beyond your physical beauty the more beautiful you become.  It's amazing to discover that true beauty is not tangible; it's very much intangible.

Stay beautiful!


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