Dreading the Wedding (he he!)

[emhain]

Ok, so here's the deal. I have this friend that I have known literally all my life. We met when I was 8 weeks old. We were neighbors growing up, but then I moved. Through Jr. High and High School we ran with different crowds and went to different schools, but still saw each other occassionally. We never really let cliques affect our friendship. When I moved further away (out of state) she was the only person I kept in touch with. Since we've become adults, I have seen her 4 times. The first time was at my 1st wedding and everything went fine. The 2nd time was her college graduation. She was a needy, emotional, bossy basketcase. I just chalked her behavior up to nerves. At that time she had not once held a job and had not contributed financially to her education, whereas I was already raising a 2 year old, married, then divorced. The next visit was when she hit a very rough patch in her life and I decided to fly her out to visit me & my family. She was soooo high-maintenance. She would do NOTHING until we had found someplace to serve her a half-caff, no-fat, latte with a shot of expresso. Every day. She behaved like a spoiled teenager to get me to agree to take her into NYC and when I did she drank so much the night before that she was miserable the whole time. The whole visit was exhausting and made me question our friendship. A few years went by and we were still friends when I had my second child. My friend decided to visit us again. She was exactly the same that time, knowing I had a 6 y/o and a 6 m/o to care for.

Now she's getting married. The whole production has been a nightmare. Wedding's on, now it's off, now it's on, off again...Who knows what today's deal is. Then she called to ask if my oldest would be her flower girl. I said sure. Then she actually said this to me: "I would ask you to be my maid of honor, but Erica got all mad because you live so far away and she's been here with me the whole time so she feels it should be her. I don't really want any wedding day drama, so I just asked her to do it."   WTF? If you want someone else to do it, fine. But don't come to me with your Oh, you almost made it! crap. Wow, if maid of honor is about who can be the biggest baby, by all means let someone else do it. I somehow thought it was about friendship and support- silly me. Whatever.

I guess my point here is that I'm dreading her wedding (I love the way that rhymes, maybe I'll write her a song as a wedding gift!). I don't want to deal with the drama and the fuss. I know that's how weddings are, but I also know she will be so much worse than anyone I've ever seen. She will put Bridezillas everywhere to shame, I just know it.

I'm going to her wedding. I made that commitment. But after that, I just want to be done. I don't need this kind of friendship. It takes up too much energy and I always come out feeling drained and pissed off.

I think I need better friends.

[coleyBoosmom]

Jul. 20, 2007 at 3:34 PM I think you have great insight about the whole situation.  After the wedding grab the flower girl and run!!!

[Nonoluna]

Jul. 20, 2007 at 3:53 PM

Oh man!!! It's like you've described the last wedding I was part of! She was an absolute nightmare. No one could do enough for her, she was still wanting more! The entire wedding day she kept repeating, like a mantra...today is all about me. Today is all about me. Today is all about me. It was ridiculous. Needless to say, the marriage did not last.

Good luck getting through this.