What am I obssessed with?

[walkingbird1987]

I must have some obsessive compulsive tendencies.  I have more than 10 spiral notebooks with notes I have taken (Over the last five or so years, not all at once) on Feng Shui. I am trying to unravel all the intricacies of the science, well not all of them...the basics! Just the basics.  As I plot out my Ba Guas and set up the compass directions and label them, I was transposing information half the time! That won't work, I don't want to do anything wrong for heaven's sake.  The last two weeks I have filled out notes and plans in another one and a half spiral books.  I go back to the charts, check and double check them. Then as the book fills up, I start making a table of contents so I can find the pages I need to refer back to. 

OK, it doesn't stop there, I have more than 10 spirals on all kinds of diets, three or four on Yoga, up to 10 on spiritual studies, some on Egyptian pictures, over three hundred cataloged drawing/doodles I have made since 9-11, six journals on Magic, others on UFOs from back in the 60's to 80's, some on the Dead Sea Scrolls, a pile of spirals on Essential Oils, and I have started and stopped 30 or more on-line businesses. I have tons of personal journals, etc.   Even a box full of genealogy work and charts and family stories, actually more like ancestor stories.    And what do I want to do with all this?    I want to go through them all and shred them all when I am done...

One time about a year ago I was comparing all this to someone that learns how to play piano, or sing....all the songs they practiced were heard once, then were gone..all that was left was the polish.  They had done the practice to improve themselves.  That's basically what all these notebooks are about, I am practicing. Trying to get it down, to get it right,  but all these apple boxes full of paper are a burden to me.  When I am gone, they will be trashed, or burned. Probably never read.

And who would want all these recipes I have copied? Even the recipe spiral notebooks have a Table of Contents!  But you know what, if I want inspiration for dinner, I look at books that have great pictures. I have written over hundreds of recipes,  typed recipes for three cookbooks. The last one I typed the whole book and illustrated it.  The formulas are in my head. My memory sometimes fails me, but the pictures will quickly get my obsessive brain going again.

Last night there was a movie on with Patrick Stewart, called Safe House.  He was obsessed with his issues, it was comedy.  Guess it made me think how I am not that much different.  I  have become compulsive. I am obsessing over this......

[namesjusgrammy]

Jul. 22, 2007 at 2:53 PM You should publish some of this stuff.