Have you ever felt that your alone?

[Sanntownley]

My husband & I feel this way alot becuase it feel like we are the only one that care or lovethem. And that is the most scary feeling for a parent with three special needs child. What would happen to them if somthing happened to us? what do we do or if you have any conferting word to tell please do it really hard right now knowing there is no help from the one you love and being married into a family with three special children and they don't get the love and attion like the rest of the family does. and being thier mother It really hurt for them to be treated like that. i could go on and but I'll stop thanks for letting me vent thanks Stacie & Caleb

[psugal]

Jul. 27, 2007 at 1:13 AM

So sorry to read you are feeling so low.  You are never truly alone because you can reach out to us - cafemoms are one big network of help and support.  I know what you mean though - when my DH and I wrote our wills to elect a guardian for our daughter I sat in the lawyers office crying and crying.

[Angebor]

Jul. 27, 2007 at 1:28 AM

We have a daughter, 13, who has special needs.  Her challenges are severe mental disability, epilepsy, non-verbal (doesn't form words), and mild cerebral palsy.

We have not felt as though others don't love her or don't love her the way we do.  We HAVE struggled with the situation of family and friends not really getting how difficult it can be to deal with special need children.  Because of her behavior and the fact she doesn't speak, she is often excluded from family events.

We realize that she takes a special kind of care and our focus is on making sure that there is as much quality in her life as possible and surround her with resources that aid her development and health.  Others will demonstrate their love to her when they can and as best they can.  With God's strength, as her parents we will be there for her as long as we physically are able.  In her world, this seems to be what matters most to her.  She seems to be oblivious to the struggles of others with her conditions.  We've decided we will be too

[SunshineMama]

Jul. 27, 2007 at 2:40 PM

Yes, we really have nothing to do with either side of the family. There are many reasons. One of them being that the grandparents treat my children different.

We have slowly found a few people that we can trust with our children. It seems like they do not last long in our lives -- they either move or our childen just burn them out. It always makes me sad but we just carry on.

I still did not finish our will yet --one reason --I am not such who to ask to take care of my children. I told my hubby --it's official, we just can not die! :) It is a huge frustration on my part.

Because the bottom line --No one can take care of your children the way You can. I just ask God to bring into our lives people who will keep our children safe and not harm them. I ask God to keep our family strong and together.  

In the end you can only do the best that you can do. Then hope and pray everything else works for the best in the end.  

Remember you are not alone --God is with you.

[genevieve3]

Jul. 27, 2007 at 6:15 PM 2 or our 3 have special needs. I have wondered what would become of them if I were to pass...You will get through this  and good times are just on the horizon.

[saulsmom]

Jul. 28, 2007 at 12:31 AM

hi how are you? thank you for emailing me and asking for advice

i have been married for 11 in sept and i have a 8 yr old w/ odd and a 9 yr old w/ adhd poddible autisuim we will know when school starts . i know what you all are afraid of the same thing i;m afraid of but you know you beed to have someone you trust a sister or brother or their godparents and sit down with the one u trust the most and talk to them from ur heart and ask them that if something would ever happen to u and ur husband  that if u can feel that u have someone u love very much that if they would takr care of ur kids i know that is the harest thing to discuss but it's reality. u know when i was single i bought a life policy of 50,000 and i had my parents then my husband now i have one of my sisters because i thought what would happen to my kids if something would happen to us who are they going to ask for help when they grow up so i changed the beneficary to my sister and i trust her with all heart . i know she wouldn't use that money she has plenty and she also has a daughter that has autisuim so i sat down w/ her and told her that she was the beneficary on my life policy and that that money was for my kids education and she said no problem i will make sure the get their education. i will not trust any other sister or brother. and always pray to god and ask him to keep you here for your kids they need you and for him to keep them safe.

there was a day that me and this sister went to a vocational bible school and we took our kids and there was a pastor from africa preaching and he finished and ask anyone wanted prayer and i told my sister i'm going so he can pray for my kids and i was just standing there praying and i didn;t even talked or say anything to this pastor and he came up to me and put his hand on my forehead and said to me your kids are going to be ok don't worry and i was crying like never before. from that day forward i believe god has been with me and my kids. and know trhat my daddy passed on in feb 24, 07 i pray to him AND ASK HIM TO TELL GOD TO HELP ME AND THE FAITH HAS TO BE THERE because we need to be strong for our kids. my mil is very good about praying for us and our kids she;s always prayiing for us that is nice of her.

you my husband working off shore and in the oilfeild and his hardly with us so i do very thing with my kids his only with them when his off which is only 5 days out of the month. all i can tell you is never lose your faith and always have someone ready in case of an eemergency you just never know.

 

i hope that what i 'm telling u here help u know i will always be here u have a friend here ok

i will be praying for u and ur family keep that chin up and don't let the devil lie to u and put fear in you pray as a couplle and believe as a couple.

 

god bless you and take care ok

sulema