Elusive sleep

[froggsie]

As a child, I was plagued with "growing pains".  I can remember my sweet Mom rubbing my legs for nights on end trying to relief the awful feeling I would get in my legs.  As I grew older and quit growing, I would still get that creepy achy feeling on occasion where I would go for a few nights without sleep or rest.  Because unfortunately, the feeling in my legs wouldn't even let me just sit awake - I had to keep moving.

 After the birth of my three kids, it seemed to get worse.  A lot worse.  I was miserable on the nights I couldn't sleep.  And with 3 young kids, I found myself crazy for sleep.  Often I could doze off just as the days first light was appearing but that didn't work with needing to supervise the kids.  Somehow it never occurred to me that this may be a medical condition that could be helped with medication.  I think because it was just written off as "growing pains" when I was a kid so I figured I would get the same kind of glib comment.

Finally I went through a period of 4 days with literally no sleep.  I dozed off right around 6:30 just to have to get up at 7:00 for the kids.  My symptoms were so much worse at night that there was no comparison.  I went to my angel of a doctor and told him I had awful insomnia.  I described the creepy crawly sensations in my legs and my inability to stay still.  I told him I would cut off my legs if I didn't think I would still have phantom pains and then I couldn't even rub my legs.  He just nodded and said that he knew exactly what my problem was.  I was so grateful I could have hugged him.  He said "you have RLS"  I had vaguely heard of that and it just felt right once he said that.  I think I had thought about that at one time and forgotten it without taking it to the doctor.  RLS is Restless Leg Syndrome.  It sounds so innocuous and gentle but it is such torture.  They should rename it to Oh my God there are bugs crawling in my legs and if I don't move I think I'll scream syndrome.  He told me that at times RLS is accompanies with Periodic Limb Movement Disorder (PLMD) and again, this hit home.  The kids often ask why I twitch so much as I go off to sleep and it was a relief to know I'm not alone.  We discussed medication options and I was back to sleep that night!  The medication I'm taking does not help with the PLMD and I kick and jump as I start to relax but that I can live with.  That is also something I've had since I was young.

But here I am at 5:17 writing in my journal because I can't sleep.  Unfortunately, there are times that I wake up at night with the creepy feelings and I have to wait for the medication to take effect.  It isn't too bad tonight - at least I can use the computer.  In fact, I think I can go back to bed and get some worthwhile sleep.  Good night all.......