Decisions

[froggsie]

Well, I told my husband that we need to discuss him moving out of the house.  It wasn't easy to do but he went one step too far for me on Friday.  He started out by telling me he is going to Minneapolis on Thursday.  No problem there although I do have to rearrange some things now to accommodate that.  I asked him if he already had plane tickets and he did.  I asked when he made reservations and it was sometimes about a week ago.  That started the day off pretty bad because all I've ever asked from him is better communication.  He thinks he is doing good by telling me almost a week before the event but he KNEW over a week ago that he had tickets to go.  I had no idea he was even thinking of this trip.  That by itself wouldn't have been the final straw but that was early in the morning.  He had the entire rest of the day to make me angrier.

 I reminded him that I would be taking the kids to Alabama Adventure on Saturday.  He repeated that he heard that I would like to take the kids to Alabama Adventure.  I told him no, that wasn't what I said.  I said that I WAS taking the kids to Alabama Adventure on Saturday.  No discussion.  The time for discussion was weeks ago when I first told him about the trip.  He got all huffy and told me the kids were his kids also and he had some say in it.  I told him when he started pulling his weight we could discuss it a bit more.

 The kids and I got home fairly early.  We ate at 6:00 like hubby has insisted is dinner time even though he doesn't even try to make it home by 6:00.  Truthfully, we ate that early so that we wouldn't have to put up with his controlling behavior during dinner.  I can only handle so much of it.  Hmm - I don't even think Dr. Phil could help us.

So when hubby gets home, we have already settled in for Friday movie night.  It is a tradition that the kids and I have and I always make sure we have a good movie for the evening.  He made us turn off the TV (I know - I should have held my ground) and said before anything like that, the kids had to practice their piano, make their beds, yada, yada, yada.  I asked him if he was planning on helping with any of that or was I expected to do all the work to be sure his decree was carried out.  Well he just sat there like a lump and actually did expect me to do all of the work to make the kids do his will.  And there was that implication that I couldn't watch TV until I got them to do it all.  I was seething to start with and then Keegan came in and told me that while I was talking he was moving his mouth mocking everything I said.  It is one thing to do that, but to do it in front of the kids is where I draw the line.  I went back in and told him I didn't appreciate him mocking me in front of the kids and he goes off on a tangent about my disrespect for him.  I certainly never treat him like that.

 I sat and thought about it and went out to pet the dogs which always calms me down.  I finally went in and told him that based on that, we have a irretrievable break and it is time to discuss him moving out.  He gets his little grin on his face and says "is that right".  I said definitely and that we need to start dissolving our union.  He has pretty much ignored that the rest of the weekend but he can definitely tell a difference in my behavior towards him.  He brought me home my favorite chocolate today but that certainly isn't going to turn the tide.  I have had enough and mocking me in front of the kids is the last break.  I always tell the kids how much he loves them (it isn't easy to tell) and build him up.  But I don't get anywhere near the same courtesy.  Enough is enough.  The kids don't need to think this is normal between men and women.