overwhelmed

[lisakay3]

I am in the process of moving out of state.  I am so tired and overwhelmed.  I just found out our house will not be ready tell December now and I was planning on being there already.  I am so frustrated.  Half or almost all our stuff is packed so I have nothing I need or very little.  My house is a crazy mess because there is no place for anything anymore.  There are no pictuers on the wall and I hate that.  It is depressing.  I have twin 6 year olds I am home schooling and a very active two year old.  However the last few days he has been a really good baby.  Except he still does not sleep through the night.  Two years actually longer with no sleep.  We have had g foster kids in our home over the last three years, three of which were babies.  One right after another so I have not sleep in what seems like forever.  I know this to shall pass but while I am in the process  I feel grumpy, tired and the worst mom in the world.  I am lonley because we are not involved in anything right now since I thought we were going to be moved by now. 

All I want to do is cry but even that takes to much energy.  I have no motivation to do anything.  We have been through so much these last few years trying to adopt our three kids.  Now that everything is done and we will get to keep the kids I feel this let down.  Like finally I can grieve over what we have been through.  I am not use to a life with no lawyers and social workers and visits etc.  It is so strange to be home with nothing to do.  The kids really are being good through the whole process of moving I jsut want to get on with our lives.

Speaking og which I better get myself to do something today beside play on the computer.