Neurotypical Syndrome

I'm not meaning to frighten you, but I think I have something going on and it might raise doubts...I don't know...I hope I don't raise something that you find wrong in yourself too...I haven't wanted to speak of it, well, not until all of this diagnostic stuff came out. Well here goes:

I seem to be putting on facades. I mean, everyone expects that I act and be a certain way. They expect me to say nice things even when I'm not thinking nice things. I guess this is called social etiquette, and it really exhausts me. Nevertheless, I lie. Yes, that's right. I tell someone I like their hair when I really hate it. Or I say "no your'e not fat!" when it's darn sure that the person I said that to has put on a few. Or "nice to see you" when I really couldn't care if I saw you a hundred years from now. Lying to people is a number one symptom of Neurotypical Syndrome (NT). I read all about it today.

"Those with Neurotypical Syndrome express a qualitative impairment in being alone as manifested by at least two of the following:

(a) lack of ability in spending time in the company of oneself for a long duration;
(b) preoccupation with being with others, and social events."

Here's another one: I think I am superior. Yes, that's right. To anyone who cannot do as I do. In fact, there's no one as good as me. I believe this is called arrogance in the diagnostic criteria for NTS:

"(c) preoccupation with oneself, one's career, one's material and physical image;
(d) preoccupation with one's social status, fame and income. "

I do too many things and don't really focus on one. Instead of just focussing on one thing at a time, like I would like to do, I try to do too many things and it seems like I've got it all figured out, but I really don't. "Inability to focus intensively on one interest," is a definite symptom.

Judgement. I judge everyone. I judge based on whether you are like me or not like me. I expect everyone to blend together, to homogenize. If there is any difference, I become afraid and have to send that different person away. "Persistent intolerance of others," is another symptom.

I am highly impatient. I guess that's why I don't really think that hard about anything. It takes up too much time when I have to get my hair done. I thought about becoming a musician once, but eh, I just wanted to go to the clubs with my friends, instead. Not to mention impatient with others. I don't have time to listen to your bla bla!

I take things for granted. Um hum. Big time. I don't take time to "smell the flowers" or watch the rain fall... Who has time? I need to stand in line at Starbucks while I'm rushing to get to work!

It says in this manual I read today, that "the onset of Neurotypical Disorder is prior to three years of age....there is also a strong fascination for social belonging to the point of chronic lying...In most cases, there is an associated diagnosis of depression, substance-related disorders, sedative dependence, and other behavioural symptoms including inability to listen carefully to others, difficulty with empathy, and a deep fear of heterogeneity."

There were more symptoms in this manual I read ...I'm too upset to write them all down. You will have to look them up in the DSM. If you have more than three symptoms, I think that means you are lower functioning. If you have just one or two, there's more hope. I am in BIG trouble. I am not normal!!!


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Comments:

Mom2P...
Oct. 25, 2007 at 10:12 PM LMAO these get better and better i am enjoying them.

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ZaMaJ...
Oct. 26, 2007 at 12:30 PM LOL!  We're all in trouble!!!

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