I went to the social security office again today. I'm actually not joking when I say I have a phobia of government buildings. And community colleges. It's crazy, but anytime I'm in a DMV or courthouse, my chest gets tight and the walls narrow and I'm convinced everyone is staring at me. So my third trip to the social security office in two weeks was something I looked forward to only because I was sure I had every possible document ever created about my son in his 18 months post-uterus and would probably never have to go again. I have never been more wrong about anything ever. What I need SS to do is complicated, but essentially I'm just trying to get Christopher's last name changed over to my fiance's last name. I've actually gone a total of 5 times. Just 3 of them were in the last 2 weeks. Each time, I'm told I need to come back with some ridiculous "document" that has nothing to do with anything. So I contact whoever I need to contact, get the ridiculous document, and go back. Wash, rinse, repeat. There are no appointments. You have to get a number, wait an hour with your screaming bored kid who suddenly has no interest in his toys, only to be told you get to do it again once you jump through some new out-there hoop.
Keep in mind, all I -really- need to happen here is to change my son's last name on his social security card. It's now come down to the social security office needing a document that I can't get without his social security card with the new name. If you're sensitive to the f-bomb, you may want to skip the rest of this post, as I am about to come unglued.
Are you freaking kidding me? I need to have a California document to get his name changed that I can't get without his social security card. Are you freaking kidding me? I generally consider myself a lady, and my conversation is almost always polite. But there is only one descriptive word for the social security office. Fuckers. And then to boot, the helpful woman upon hearing my dilemna actually gave me the palms-up shrug.
I want to abolish social security now more than ever. Before it was just a general political belief that it's not what the Constitution had in mind. Now it's personal. I'm coming after you, fuckers. I now hate you more than the IRS mostly. I'm going to make it my life's mission until I get bored of it to make sure your junk goes privatized. And when Pepsi takes over, there will be two application processes. One for people who didn't work for social security and one for people who did. Fuckers.