Dear ex-husband

[DriftJunky]

Dear ex-husband,

 

I write to you today because I can no longer stand to hold my tongue. I am fair, I am reasonable and I try my damn best to be as understanding as I possibly can because I know you aren’t always the brightest tool in the tool shed.

 

Our divorce is yet to be finalized because you wish to procrastinate and your lawyer must re-read everything to you because you are dyslexic and never wanted to even try reading. I wait patiently I do no argue I do not throw hissy fits, but my goodness we have been in the divorcing stage for 3 years now. Yet I will wait and I will not rush you because I know you are still trying to move on.

 

I am writing to you mainly in concern for my son. Yes, MY son. Sure you gave your part in making the baby; underneath it all I know you never wanted him. You wanted an abortion so bad. So maybe there is a chance that my son has grown on you since his birth and I don’t doubt that you have some love for him, but I do not believe you care for him as much as you truly do.

 

You put me throw so much pain and anguish out of spite for me. I understand that and expect your childish behavior every day, but you do it at the expense of my son’s feelings. My son loves you with all of his heart, but you choose to use him as a weapon against me. Which I will not deny it works every single time and it always will.

 

So here is where I get nasty.

 

In these past 3 years you have hidden my son from me 3 times. You have sent my son to the emergency room 3 times. There has been 5 times you have refused to take my son to the emergency room and I have taken him. The 3 weekends of the month you get him I receive my son back wearing the same clothes I dropped him off in, with no bath, and smelling like the pig sty you live in. Of the Sundays you drop him off to me you bring him a few hours late every other Sunday. You refuse to answer my calls when I want to talk to my son. You deny my son to attend play dates YOU set up with his classmates. My list can go on and on.

 

Here is a list of the excuses you use everyday.

1. He didn’t want a bath so I didn’t give him one.
2. He liked the clothes you put on him so I didn’t change him.
3. I don’t have a watch so I didn’t know what time it is.
4. I didn’t have my phone it was in the car.
5. He doesn’t need to play with his friends he’s only 3 years old he’s fine.
6. Pre-school isn’t even a real school so I don’t need to bring him.
7. It’s only a minor scratch he’s fine. (FYI Burning the skin off my son’s foot isn’t a scratch)
8. You were acting like a bitch so I don’t need to tell you where he is.
9. It’s not like you love him so you don’t need to talk to him.

 

Again this list can go on and on also.

 

But what I came to realize is that though our lawyers suck and sole custody isn’t in my grasp, yet. You do this to spite me. You spite me out of jealousy. Because you realize it’s your entire fault. Our marriage failed because of your lack of love for me and my son. I carried you on my back the whole 4 years I was with you.

 

I managed our money, we had no less than $8,000 in our savings and checking combined at the end of the month. I managed your business because you didn’t understand any of the paper work, taxes, and hated talking to people. I made all your phone calls because you are too intimated. I encouraged you to go for your dreams and do something that will make you happy, but your self-esteem was so low that you are now stuck being a carpenter. Though not a bad job it’s something I know you hate.

 

With me gone now you are lucky to have $80 in 1 account. You closed your savings because you don’t know how to budget. Your parents left so now you live in their storage space. Which is “nice” but you have no bathroom and your shower is outside. You pay a consistent $2000 in taxes every year because you don’t handle your paperwork like how I taught you. You don’t have consistent customers because you refuse to be friendly and call them back.

 

Now here’s the kicker you use your personal problems as excuses for everything. I know you are dyslexic, but so are your father and brother. Your dad owns a successful business and manages all the paperwork, money and payroll. Your brother now works on some of the best video games and creates his own indie games. But you depended on your mother your whole life to do everything. I understand you are shy, but if you can’t make your own phone calls at 23 years old I don’t know what to say anymore.

 

On top of it all you are scared. You know your short comings as a husband and now as a father. My son is an incredibly bright person. He is always on a constant adventure to learn about everything around him. He loves being read books. He loves listening to a wide range of music. He loves art. He loves dancing. He loves being a people person. My son is the complete opposite of you.

 

He may only be 4 years old, but his intelligence far surpasses you. At least he makes his own phone calls. By the time he is in the 3^rd grade his reading level will be above yours. His math skills will far surpass what you can comprehend. He will have made and met more people than you can even bring yourself to say hello to.

 

You know you can not create the household that will help build and nurture the growing person my son is. So you force my son to play video games and watch mindless martial arts videos with you all day. You force my son to stay up and go to the illegal drags with you. You force my son to follow in your footsteps so you may never have to deal with the fact that my son is better and smarter than you.

 

So for now I will let you bask in the small bit of happiness you receive by putting me through hell and tearing my heart apart. My son will catch on to what you do and you are nothing more than self loathing, hurtful, and selfish man. I have pity for you, but I will not help you anymore.

 

Signed your not soon enough ex-wife.

[Flanuora]

Dec. 14, 2007 at 3:18 PM

You're a strong woman.  I am sorry you and your son have to deal with that crap.